


Strangers on a Train

by Petri808



Series: Fairytail AU Short Stories & One Shots [30]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Depression, F/M, Heavy Angst, Kidnapping, Maybe - Freeform, Met On A Train, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Stalker, Strangers, Strangers to Lovers, Trains, Trauma, eventually lol, physical trauma/attack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:26:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 27
Words: 38,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25545091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Petri808/pseuds/Petri808
Summary: Lucy Heartfilia was tired and ready to get back home when she spies the last open seat on the train. But as she turns to sit down, another person swoops in and snags it... a rather cute guy in fact... Who's happy to provide his lap so she can sit too. Oh Boy!A bit of miscommunication and snags, but what will happen when an unexpected rival tries to intervene...
Relationships: Natsu Dragneel/Lucy Heartfilia
Series: Fairytail AU Short Stories & One Shots [30]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/760656
Comments: 22
Kudos: 193





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> originally written for Nalu Day 7/26/2020 as a one shot, but someone requested a part 2 so... after thinking about it, this is gonna end up with about 24 chapters, all short, updated on Saturdays until completed because my brain decided to add a twist lol

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/624699503868542976/drabble-for-nalu-day-7262020>

Lucy makes a mad dash for one of the open subway doors. It was the last train headed to her area of the city for the night and she really didn’t want to spring for a taxi. As she breaches the opening, her eyes quickly scan and sees one last open seat. Score!

She hauls her backpack from her shoulder and turns around to sit back into the awaiting chair, when instead of hitting a hard surface, Lucy lands on a pair of legs?! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! The blonde quickly twists at her torso to look behind her, ready to berate the seat stealer!

But when Lucy’s eyes land on the man’s face, whatever words she was ready to throw at him snag in her throat. He was young, around her age and cute! His eyes crinkle into a breathtaking smile that sends a wave of heat flooding her cheeks.

“Hey,” the smiling pink-haired man waves once in acknowledgement. “Nice night, don’t you think?”

That snaps her focus back to the situation. This guy stole her seat! Lucy narrows her eyes, “It was, until some guy decided to steal my seat out from under me.”

“Beat you fair and square,” he smirks back in retort. “Besides, I don’t see a problem. You’re sitting aren’t ya?”

“W-Well yes, but I’m on your lap!”

“I don’t mind,” he shrugs. “Look miss...”

She crosses her arms. “Lucy.”

“Names Natsu,” he smiles again. “Miss Lucy. It’s late. I’m tired. You look tired. Let’s just play nice and share this seat, hmm? I sure don’t mind having a pretty girl on my lap.”

 _‘Oh my...’_ is he flirting with her?! Okay she couldn’t lie, having a cute guy flirting with her wasn’t a bad thing, but it was just a bit weird to be sitting on some strange man’s lap! “Natsu, you seem sweet and all but, this is just... awkward. You know?”

“Pfft, nonsense.” He wraps his arms around her waist and adjusts her better on his thighs. “See? Perfect fit and I’ll even make sure you won’t slip off.”

Ugh! Lucy groans internally. “Okay, fine.” She faces forward again and focuses on anything else but the fact she’s sitting on a guy’s lap... a really cute guy... but still it’s a stranger... who seems nice... and sweet, and it beats standing in the swaying car considering she was tired... _‘omg shut up!’_ She shouts in her head at herself.

The train ride would take about 30 minutes to reach her stop, so she would just have to endure this situation or stand. Maybe she’ll even get lucky and another seat will open up. She stares forward to ignore anything else... like his strong arms wrapped around her waist... Lucy swallows back saliva in a bid to reinvigorate her drying throat.

Natsu, was it? He was quiet which helped her to pretend she wasn’t on his lap. At least he wasn’t continuing to talk or flirt with her. Maybe he really was just a nice, tired guy trying to get through this train ride just like her. _‘He didn’t kick me off... and he could have.’_

In her experience, it was rare to find guys like this. Of course, he could have been a gentleman and not stolen her seat, but sharing wasn’t gonna kill her either. They both could benefit from sitting down.

She smiles softly to herself. Okay, this wasn’t so bad...

They’d just passed the third-way mark to her stop, when Lucy feels his head come to rest on her back and shoulder area. With his arms still tightly wound around her waist, she could only manage to turn her head. But it was enough to realize the poor guy had fallen asleep. He wasn’t kidding when he’d said he was tired.

Her heart blooms a little in her chest. Wow this guy felt so comfortable with her. It was weird yet... it made her feel good. The smile on her face widens just a tad more as she looks down at his hands and arms. They were toned and lightly tanned, with no ring on his finger. Well she’d hope not considering he was letting a strange girl sit on his lap! She chuckles, hey it meant he was single.

Wait no, no! Why is she thinking about that?! _‘Get a grip on yourself Lu!’_ She’d been without a boyfriend for a year, too focused on her final year of college to worry about relationships. This wasn’t the time to be thinking about this stuff!

_‘Though... it is hard to find a decent guy...’_

Lucy shushes her conscious and rolls her eyes. She couldn’t believe she was trying to set herself up like that!

_‘It wouldn’t kill you to see him again... you know, maybe for coffee... make a new friend?’_

No... it wouldn’t... and making a new friend would be nice...

She sucks in a breath and reaches slowly into her backpack, grabbing a piece of scratch paper and a pen. After scribbling her name and phone number onto it, Lucy folds it up and manages to slip it into one of his pants pockets without waking him. Now that, that was done, the blonde let’s out the inhale she’d been holding. It was all in his hands now.

Not that she wanted to get her hopes up. Meeting a stranger on a train wasn’t exactly the normal place to look for love. He’ll probably just toss the paper, if he happens to find it before sending it through the wash. Well, what’s done is done.

Soon enough her stop arrives. She slowly unravels his arms and slips out of his grasp, then settles the sleeping man back against the chair rest. With one last look before stepping out of the door, Lucy wondered if she’ll ever see Natsu again. But if it’s meant to happen... it will.


	2. Chapter 2

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/625325858828238848/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

The sudden feeling of the cool air in the train car against his arms stirs Natsu from a blissful sleep. He sits up and stretches with a yawn, letting his eyes sweep over the flashing list of stops coming up. There was only one more to go and that was awesome because soon enough he’ll be able to crawl into bed.

 _‘Wow,’_ he thinks to himself, _‘I must be really tired.’_ It wasn’t often he fell asleep on the train, and it was a good thing he’d woken up in time. Too bad he was having such a nice dream. It was the kind he hoped for when he had a solid 8 hours to enjoy; though rare as those times may be.

Being a full-time student while working part time was taxing, especially around mid-terms or finals. Hence the late-night train ride. But he was one of the lucky ones considering his workplace was flexible with students and their needs. Gramps, as they called him, was the old guy running the place. He enjoyed hiring young people because they made him feel younger. Whatever his reason, Gramps treated his employees like they were his own kids and Natsu always felt at home there. 

Oh, but the blonde in his dream was such a cutie! What was her name again... darn he couldn’t quite remember; maybe Suzy? He knows there’s a y in there somewhere but that was all his addled brain could register. It was such a silly dream too, of them vying for an open seat on the train. Natsu smirks as he remembers convincing the woman to sit on his lap. It was a valid point after all, to share a spot in the full car.

Ugh, her smile was infectious, and she had such a feisty personality! His mind was clearly working on overtime to come up with his perfect girl. He chuckles to himself. Perhaps her beauty had been so overwhelming, that was why he couldn’t remember her name. And the cute blush on her cheeks when his words grew flirty surprised even him. In real life being a flirt was really not in his DNA, and most of the time he resorted to comedy to deal with all the anxiety it induced.

 _‘Man! I hope I dream about her again!’_ He groans in his head. Even the warmth he felt in the dream chased away the chill of the air conditioning in the train. That had to be some amazing chemistry to pull off such a physical reaction.

Though it was odd to Natsu that he’d manifested a woman he’d never met before as far as he knew. Was she a customer at the store or maybe another student he’s seen in passing? If that was the case, Natsu wanted to slap himself for not noticing them sooner!

By the time Natsu reaches the apartment he shares with his friend Gray Fullbuster, the hour was pushing 11pm. His roommate was already holed up in his own room and probably asleep. So, he takes a quick shower then retreats to his room too. Thank goodness, not having an early morning class meant he could catch some extra zzz’s or get a couple of hours in working on an assignment.

Natsu throws himself backwards onto the comfortable bed and closes his eyes. He stares at the darkness behind those lids like a movie screen waiting for the conductor to turn on the reel. Come on, he wills himself, show me blondie again. He digs into his memory banks, hoping if he falls asleep with her image in his mind, it’ll cue the dream reel to play again.

Her golden blonde hair shined like a Tuscan sunset. It was neatly pulled back in a high ponytail, with a few tendrils falling loose near her face. They framed her milky smooth skin and highlighted the large chocolate brown eyes that twinkled when he made her flustered. She was a full-figured gal, busty and them hips... oh those hips were just perfection.

Call it what you will, a male lush, but he liked a little meat on their bones. Girls who were all straight up and down weren’t as appealing to him. _Pretty_ , just not his taste. But that wasn’t the only thing he wanted in a woman. They had to have some smarts too, and judging from her book bag, Suzy or whatever was a fellow college student like him. Check more points off the list.

Kami help him this dream girl really was his dream woman!

Who was this mysterious blonde who’d found her way into his dream? Speaking of which, was one of the most vivid ones he’s ever had in his life. Her voice. Her scent. The warmth of her body as he hugged her. It all was so clear to Natsu even an hour later.

But it had to be a dream, right? Seriously, in what reality would a stranger ever let a man hug onto them? Yet she never made a move to push him away or appear uncomfortable. Quite the opposite. If Natsu was remembering the dream correctly, the blonde relaxed after he’d wrapped his arms around her waist.

He certainly felt comfortable with her too, and his intuition never did him wrong yet. Of course, being that this was his dream to direct, it shouldn’t surprise him the blonde was so perfect in every possible way. Kudos to his production team for writing such a magnificent script. His only complaint being, SHE WASN’T REAL!

Natsu let’s out a chuckling yawn just as his focus starts to dim and his exhaustion catches up. _A stranger on a train_ , huh? This was one story he’ll just keep to himself for now. Because knowing Gray, if he told his roommate about some perfect woman in a dream, the guy would tease him mercilessly. Whatever lucky stars he’d wished upon to receive this dream girl, he could only hope they’d bless him with a reoccurring role.


	3. Chapter 3

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/625926285802323968/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

The dorm building was as still as a graveyard by the time Lucy got back home. Not surprising with mid-terms licking at their heels. Half of the residents were probably asleep, while the rest cramming for exams. In the small double dorm room, she shared with her friend, the woman, Levy McGarden was still up reading a textbook.

It didn’t surprise her to find Levy awake. They had an unspoken rule between them to wait up and make sure the other made it home safely. This was a big city after all, and they were young women that looked out for one another.

“How was the library?” The girl questions from her book. “Find the materials you needed?”

“Yup!” The blonde smiles and drops her book bag next to a small desk. “Now I just need to write up the paper.”

“Ah, the fun part.”

Lucy chuckles, “yeah. Well while you prefer the research, I prefer the writing.”

“It’s why were such great friends!” Levy giggles in response.

“So...” Lucy plops onto her bed, fidgeting with her fingers in her lap. “There was one more interesting thing tonight...”

The brunette’s eyebrow cocks upward. “Oh?”

“I met a guy on the train...”

For the next several minutes, Lucy goes through the events. From rushing to catch the train, being thwarted from her seat, to having to share said seat. She left no details out of the story— until the part of the note. It was bad enough based on the grin blooming over her roommates face to know her friend would tease her mercilessly.

And as expected, the moment Lucy takes a breath, the girl launches into a match making session.

“Girl what were you thinking?! Why’d you just walk away?! OMG Lu, if he’s as fine as you make him sound, you should’a snatched him up right then and there!” She squeals and giggles, almost bouncing in her seat. “Please! Please! Please! Tell me you got his info!”

“He fell asleep Levy! I wasn’t gonna wake up a strange guy and go hey, what’s your number?!”

“Why not?” She shrugs her shoulders. “I would have.”

Lucy tosses her pillow at her friend while laughing. “You know I’m not that brazen!”

“I know. I know.” Levy rolls her eyes. “And school first. But what if you’re missing out on like your soulmate or something.”

“Pfft. I doubt it. But _if_ he is my _soulmate_ ,” her voice dripping with sarcasm, “then I’ll meet him again. Fate, right?”

A long, deep yawn catches Lucy by surprise, so she bids her roommate goodnight and heads off to take a quick shower. Once she’s all freshened up and warm, in her comfortable pajamas, she climbs into bed thinking about her choices that evening.

Sure, she could have asked for his information, or at least a last name. But that would have required making the first move and that just wasn’t in her to do. Okay, technically she did make a move by leaving her contact information, but it was via a note, AKA it gave her a bit of distance to hide behind.

This Natsu guy would have to make a more official first move by responding. That would tell her whether or not he was actually interested, or if he was just being a flirt on a train. It wasn’t an impossibility considering he wasn’t the first guy to ever flirt with her in public. If she never heard from him again, having never asked him out directly should lessen the turn down blow. No harm, no foul, she’ll move on with life.

Then why couldn’t she stop thinking about this?!?!

Four days have passed since the event on the train and so far, there’s been no contact made from Natsu’s end. As time passes, Lucy assumes he really wasn’t interested in her. That should be the end of it. Let it go. Levy was wrong about the whole soulmates idea. Fairytales go back to being just wishful thinking.

 _‘Kamisama, you literally only spent 30 minutes with the guy! You can’t be so enamored with a stranger!’_ Easier said than done and rationalizing with her brain only went so far. Throughout the day, Lucy was able to avoid such thoughts and focus on what she needed to do. Unfortunately, her subconscious wasn’t willing to let her quit just yet.

Lucy awoke each morning with memories of her dream the night before of which Natsu was an active part of the script. Sometimes it was train related, while others were new storylines her mind apparently wished for. This really shouldn’t surprise someone with a writers mindset. But that didn’t mean it wasn’t annoying.

One day as they walked along a campus sidewalk between buildings, her friend Levy did her best to make her friend feel better. _So, what_ , she’d said, _there’s plenty of fish in the sea to choose from and no man was worth stressing over._

“Ugh, you’re so right Lev. I don’t know why I’m fussing over this so much. I mean yes I’m bummed out but it’s not gonna kill me or anything.”

“That’s the spirit! If the guy doesn’t even have the decency to turn you down, then he doesn’t deserve you.”

“Yosh!” Lucy puts her hands on her hips with a poise of confidence. “Time to move forward!”

“Course, if you’re feeling a little lonely Loke is always willing to help you with…”

“Don’t finish that sentence!” The blushing blonde screeches despite the smile on her face. She knew very well that their friend Loke deLioncourt had a thing for her, but he also had a thing for _a lot_ of females. The man was such a playboy and Lucy had absolutely no interest in a guy like that.

“Just sayin,” Levy shrugs and grins, “I ain’t sayin’ ya need to date the guy just you know… we have needs that need filling.”

“Oh, my Kami Levy!” Lucy throws her hands up and laughs. “You are just too much sometimes!”

“Speak of the devil, I think I spot orange hair.”

“Levy!”


	4. Chapter 4

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/626580128179355648/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

“Here you go,” Natsu places his laundry basket on the floor near the front door. It was Gray’s week to be on laundry duty and his to cook. Their arrangement worked for the most part to share in household duties because it offered each other a break on things most never enjoy doing.

“Yeah, thanks.” The man looks up from the couch, “I’ll get it done this afternoon.”

“I got a test to study for, but I’ll have dinner made by 6.”

Natsu gets a thumbs up from his friend then heads back to his room. Fire chemistry and physics was his hardest class this semester, but the subject fascinated him, so it wasn’t a big burden... just a lot of content to remember. Considering how talkative he could be, most never would guess that numbers were his forte, while words were what he struggled with.

Time passes by quietly for the roommates, like a lazy Sunday should. At 1pm Gray grabs the two baskets of clothes and heads downstairs to the laundry room of the building. He nods an acknowledgment to the one other person there folding their clothes and picks a spot by the open washing machines. Without hesitation he tosses his clothes into the first machine, sets, and forgets it for now. He always preps his own before coming down. But Natsu couldn’t be trusted. Gray lost count of the amount of times he’d scolded his friend.

And sure enough, as he rifles through a pants pocket, he finds a piece of paper tucked inside. “Damn it Natsu,” he mumbles under his breath and slides it into his own pocket for later. Gray finishes checking through the clothing and tosses them into a second machine.

Gray pulls out his Switch to kill time. The washer will take about 45 minutes, then it’ll be the dryers turn, maybe another hour and a half. Perfect opportunity to catch up in his Animal Crossing game. He wasn’t as obsessed about playing it like some of their friends, but to keep Erza off his back he logs in at times like this. He was surprised the woman would play such a game considering Erza Scarlet was more a sword play kind of girl. Though he guessed there was one good thing to come from it. He’d met another gamer on the site who lives in the next prefecture over. The girl, Juvia Lockser, was sweet and pretty, and they had plans to meet in person once the semester ends for summer break.

When the washer finishes its part, Gray moves the clothing into the dryer and settles in for the final leg. He could have gone back to the apartment in between, but there were problems with theft, and he didn’t want to chance his clothes being stolen. Losing shirts was already a problem for him, with his quirk of stripping any time he felt hot or uncomfortable.

With about 30 more minutes to go, he puts the Switch down, flexing and cracking his fingers. He then stands up and stretches his back. That was enough of messing with his village. He pulls his phone from his pocket instead, intending to scroll social media for the rest of his wait, when the piece of paper falls out. Gray picks it up and unfolds it, his eyes widening, but mouth turning up into a grin. “Who is Lucy?!” He snickers. Just a name and phone number, nothing else.

Has Natsu been holding out on him? If his friend had met a girl, he was pretty sure he’d say something. Unless he was purposely trying to hide it. Thirty minutes needs to hurry up, cause he couldn’t wait to get back to the apartment now!

Laundry baskets filled, and finished, Gray heads back up. Once inside, he drops them right at the door, then marches over to his friends room. He knocks as he enters.

With the paper held up, “are you holding out on me Natsu?”

Natsu turns from his desk, “holding out on what?”

Gray waves the paper. “Who is Lucy Heartfilia? I found this in your pants pocket. A girls name and number.”

 _‘Lucy...’_ “Lucy?! Holy shit she’s real?”

“What the fuck do you mean, she’s real?! Unless an imaginary person wrote this information down!”

Natsu gets up and snatches the paper from his friends hand. He stares down at it; yup not his handwriting, so it must be hers. “I-I thought it was a dream,” he looks at Gray in shock. “I swear! I fell asleep on the train a week ago and thought I’d dreamt her up.”

He sits back on his desk chair and fills Gray in on everything he remembered or at least thought happened, describing the woman he’d met, and how. “I didn’t tell you, because I thought it was a dream.”

“Well, she sounds like a fox, and if she left you her info, it means she wanted to keep in touch.”

“So, you think I should call her?”

“No shit Sherlock! And if this was a week ago already, you better hope she doesn’t feel like you’d stood her up.”

“Ugh!” Natsu runs a hand over his face. “Why me?”

“If you’d check your damn pockets before tossing your clothes in the basket, you wouldn’t be in this predicament!”

“I know, I know,” he groans, then picks up his phone. “I hope she answers.”

“Good luck idiot,” Gray snickers and walks away.

Natsu stares at the phone screen as he taps in the numbers. But what to say?! Hey, sorry I just found your note... All this time he’d convinced himself Lucy was a figment of his imagination, so to find out she was real was shocking to his brain. It meant everything he remembered was probably true! Stealing her seat, pulling her onto his lap! Holding her! He groans out loud. _‘I must have seemed like such a pervert! But she did leave her number so it couldn’t be that bad... yeah, I’m just psyching myself out.’_ “Idiot, get ahold of yourself!”

He takes a deep breath and hits send, placing the phone to his ear. Every ring adding to the nerves torturing his mind.

“Hello?”

“H-Hi, um may I speak to Lucy please?”

“This is she. May I ask who’s calling?”

“Hey, it’s me Natsu... the guy from the train...”


	5. Chapter 5

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/627296432051879936/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

Lucy places her hand over the microphone, waving her other frantically at Levy. “It’s him!” She mouths, silently screaming as her friend motions back, prompting her to hurry up and say something!

She nods, right! “Oh, wow, I thought you’d forgotten me.” Smooth Lucy. She slaps her forehead. Idiot, not even a hi! Could you sound any less pleasant?!

Natsu groans in his head. Yup, she’s mad, she had to be, could he blame her? No. Of course she is. It’s been a week and she probably thinks he’s just a big jerk who takes advantage of women. The tone in his voice flatlines. “This was probably a mistake. I’m really sorry for bothering you miss.”

The click takes Lucy by surprise. Her mouth drops open as she turns back to Levy and the hand holding the phone drops to her side. “He… he hung up on me.”

Levy’s a tiny bit shocked that the man gave up so easily, “but you did sound annoyed that he even called. You probably scared him. Well girl, time to make a decision to save or reject him.”

“Ugh! He seemed so confident on that train, is this even the same guy?!”

Levy shrugs, “only one way to find out.”

 **Redial**. Lucy paces, 1 ring… 2 rings… 3 rings… Aww hell, she really did freak him out!

“Lucy?”

“Geez,” she groans, her hand flailing over her head, “I thought you’d never answer! Why’d you hang up on me?”

“I-I, w-well you sounded angry… and I don’t blame you! I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I’m an idiot! I didn’t find your note till today, well actually it was my roommate who found it in my pocket as he did the laundry not me, because I always forget to check my pockets before tossing it into the hamper, Gray yells at me cause I’m irresponsible with stuff like that…”

“Natsu?”

“….but it’s a good thing he’s an OCD freak about stuff like that or it woulda got washed and then I really wouldn’t have gotten your message. Ugh,” he groans through a breath, “you must think I’m such a loser not to call sooner, I mean I was shocked to find your number, but actually I kinda did forget about you… WAIT! Not forget! Well sort of…”

“Natsu??” This was starting to get irritating. She rubs her brow as the man rambles like a broken record.

“…I thought you were just a girl in my dreams! Cause I woke up on the train after what I thought was a dream and you weren’t there, so it had to be a dream, right?! What girl would give me the time of day like that and…”

“Natsu?!! Can you like, take a breath!”

Eep! He quickly bites his tongue. Way to go making the situation worse. Rambling like a complete loser, oh she must really be kicking herself for calling back now. He hears her sigh over the phone. Yup, well there goes any chance. “I’m Sorry.”

Based on the tone of his apology, an image of drooping puppy ears on Natsu’s head pops into Lucy’s mind. She almost chuckles out loud. The rambling was annoying but endearing at how much he must be kicking himself for missing the note. “It’s not completely your fault,” she sighs. “I probably shouldn’t have left the note like that and just woke you up before leaving. But… I was too nervous… and I just _thought_ it would be easier so if you weren’t interested and never called, then I could just move on. No harm no foul.”

“Why would you ever think I wouldn’t be interested?! I’m not blind or that stupid to pass up talking to you again.”

He couldn’t see it through the phone, but the tips of Lucy’s ears burned red along with a rash on her chest and blooming spread on her cheeks. Just the tone conveyed with his words. The indignation that she’d think so lowly of him or put herself down.

“If no ones told you enough Lucy, you’re kind of a hottie.”

“Pfft,” Lucy literally sputters and if she’d been drinking a beverage, the liquid would be all over the floor. “I-I am not a hottie!”

“Yes, you are.”

Lucy glares at her best friend as the woman’s words literally echoed the ones Natsu gave in retort; word for word and with the same sass. “Not helping!” She mouths to the brunette who merely sticks out her tongue with a grin.

A hand unconsciously rests on a cocked hip in irritation. “I’m flattered Natsu, but if that’s the only reason you’re interested…”

He promptly cuts her off. “You must really have a crappy history with men. Could you stop down-playing yourself and assuming things about me. I only said it cause you think so low of yourself, but really what I found attractive was your feisty attitude.”

“I—”

“How about we start over fresh, please? Hi, it’s nice to officially meet you Lucy. My name is Natsu Dragneel, the guy you met on the train. I am a student at Waseda and have a roommate who’s my best friend even though we fight all the time. I work part time and I’m studying fire sciences.”

“Pfft,” Lucy giggles, that was such a bland introduction, but it does the trick to bring her emotions back down to normal. “How interesting you’re so close by. My roommate attends Waseda too!”

“Aren’t you gonna do an introduction too?” He teases.

“Huh? Oh, right. Hi, it’s nice to meet you, my name is Lucy Heartfilia. I attend Tokyo Women's MU studying medicine and also live with a roommate."

“Was that so hard?”

“Are you always this sarcastic?”

“Only if I like you.”

“W-W, pfft.” Finally, there’s the guy she met again. Lucy palms her face even though the smile looming on it was a dead giveaway. She laughs. “I must be crazy to have given you a chance after what you pulled on the train.”


	6. Chapter 6

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/627926945191149570/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

By this point in the conversation, Natsu had retreated to his bed and laid down. He transfers the phone from one ear to the other so he’s able to turn onto his side. Things were at a middle ground and he needed to get her fully on his side. It was time for a little truthful humor.

“Aww, but why?” he whines, an amused puppy-dog expression on his face despite no one else being able to see it. “I mean we both got to sit down, that’s a win-win, right? You know sharing is caring.” After a snort of non-amusement from the other end, he relents. “Okay, I’m sorry.” A small sigh of defeat leaves his lips. “I promise in person I’m more like a dork. The sarcastic humor is just a defensive mechanism cause I’m nervous. And that night I was really, really tired. I mean you saw how quickly I fell asleep.”

“I guess that’s true…”

“And if I’d wanted to take advantage, I had the opportunity but didn’t.”

“Also, true...”

He goes in for the million-dollar question. “Lemme take you out to lunch, somewhere you’re comfortable so we can start fresh. Then you’ll see how I’m really just a goofy guy. I mean, it’s hard not to be considering I’ve got pink hair and green eyes. How much weirder could I be.”

The snorting laughter he gains from Lucy makes him smile. He was almost there.

“I don’t think you look weird,” her voice softens, almost bashful in tone and he could just imagine her blushing on the other end. “But, before I say yes, I’d like to learn a little more about you.”

Natsu chuckles, “that’s fair.” He flips onto his back, relaxed with one arm propped behind his head. “Shoot. I’m an open book.”

“Okay... um, do you have any siblings?”

“One older brother who’s married already.”

“Do you like animals?”

“I love animals! I have a cat back home with my parents named Happy. I wish I could have him here, but the apartment doesn’t allow us to have pets.”

“Aww cute name,” she giggles. “Could you send me a picture later?”

“Will do,” he beams. He’d send her a hundred photos if it’d make her smile.

“Um... what is your favorite food?”

He chuckles, “anything. I love spicy stuff, but I’m really not picky.”

“Okay last question for now, what do you want to do with your life?”

“Wow, ending with a big one there,” he laughs. Natsu assumed Lucy wanted to make sure he wouldn’t turn out to be a bum, and frankly the question made him respect her even more. “Fire’s always fascinated me, and before you ask, no I’m not a pyro,” he chuckles. “I’ve considered being a firefighter, or an arson investigator, but I’m studying to be a fire researcher.”

“What would you do with that kind of schooling?”

“Well,” he taps his chin, “take for example a car. Most people don’t realize how dangerous the engine can be, so the section that separates the engine from the passenger compartment has what’s called a firewall. In the event that the engine catches fire, that wall keeps it from getting to the passengers to give them time to flee. So, studying fire is not just about the fire itself, but what you can do with the knowledge you gain about it and how to apply in in the real world.”

“Wow— that’s pretty interesting. I mean, I don’t think it’s interesting, but just the fact you’ve put so much though into this...” Lucy pauses for a moment. “Okay Natsu Dragneel, I’ll go on a date with you.”

“Yes!” He sits up quickly pumping his fist into the air. But when he hears the full-blown laughter coming from the other end, embarrassment hits him like a brick. He clears his throat. “I-I mean, great! So, where’d you like to meet and when?”

“How about this Friday? Do you have classes that day?”

“Only in the morning, so I’m free at lunchtime.”

“Hmm, there’s a place called Shirokuma Cafe. I like their cute drinks. Would that work?”

“If that’s where you’d like to go, it works for me.”

“So, noon?”

Natsu grins wide, “it’s a date.”

“I should get back to studying now, so I’ll see you Friday...”

“Wait! Before you hang up, I have one question.”

“Yeah?”

“Is it okay if I text or call between now and Friday? I just don’t wanna overstep.”

“It’s fine,” she chuckles. “Goodbye, Natsu.”

“Goodbye.”

Natsu flips backward, hugging the phone to his chest with a sigh. “I’m in love.”

“Pfft,” he hears from his doorway. “How can you be in love after just two interactions? You don’t even know anything about her and before today you thought she was a dream!”

“I just know okay! Way to try and kill my excitement Gray.” He wasn’t about to get into a deep philosophical discussion right now.

The roommate uncrosses his arms, “it’s just insane to get too attached so soon, but whatever. So, what we doing for dinner?”

“Oh, shit! Sorry!” Natsu jumps off the bed. “I’ll get dinner started.”

Before leaving the room, he quickly sends Lucy a few of his best photos of Happy along with a text message, _‘one day, I hope you’ll get to meet him’_ with a smiley face. She responds with a heart, gushing over how cute of a kitty, and a _‘me too’_ blushing face. Natsu’s heart does a double skip at her answer. _Me too_... was she serious?! Kami, he hoped she was!

Over the course of the week, Natsu fights the urge to call or text her too often. He wanted to keep up a connection without pushing her away in his excitement. It’s been so long since she’s really crushed over a girl that he really couldn’t remember a time. Maybe at the beginning of high school and that had been fleeting at best. Regardless, this whole situation had him riding on cloud nine. Most of them were simple, have a great day or good night messages. His pride beamed when Lucy responded to the first good night beautiful with an _‘Omg’_ blushing thank you. That was a good one and he fell asleep imagining how she looked on the other end of the line.

He knew Gray was right about falling so quickly over a girl. It was crazy, insane, and yet the connection Natsu felt to Lucy was overriding any rational thought. The initial excitement was bound to slow down, but until then, he had no problem with being this happy. The dreams may have brought it more to life than an average meeting. Though it shouldn’t surprise his roommate considering Natsu’s always been the type to put 100 percent effort into whatever peaks his interest. And right now, that interest was in a beautiful, smart blonde girl that he gets to see again the next day. _‘Kami, let everything go well tomorrow!’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry I've been late updating the last couple weeks, things kept coming up irl. Hope you're enjoying this so far! :)


	7. Chapter 7

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/628485821813719040/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

<https://twitter.com/petri808/status/1289843659454574598?s=20>

Nervous didn’t quite explain the emotions running through him during the short train ride to the restaurant. His leg bounced at such a frequency, fellow riders gave him odd looks or maybe, pity. Look at that poor guy, he’s about to jump out of his skin. Haha. Bet he’s meeting a girl, that would send a man’s anxiety through the roof. But the weirdest part of the journey was the smile on Natsu’s face. He was scared, yes, yet sporting the biggest grin. In fact, he probably looked like a crazy person on drugs.

Because the truth was, Natsu was all of the above. _‘Just try to stay calm. You barely know her, so don’t get your hopes up. Be yourself, that’s all you can do. I mean why are you so nervous? Idiot she left you her number, she made the first move, clearly she saw something of interest... right?’_ Natsu sighs as the internal struggle took over. _‘You’re a good-looking guy, she’s a pretty girl. All you gotta do is...’_ “not screw up.” He mumbles under his breath.

His eyes scan the other train riders to see if anyone heard him, but no one was paying attention; at least not that he could tell. Ugh! It’s just a lunch date. A get to know you date. The kind you have to test out the waters and see if more contact is worth it. Because over the phone there’s a lot you can’t pick up on. Visual cues, behaviors, stuff that might be a total turn off. Natsu doubted Lucy would have any... or rather didn’t want to believe she would. But he didn’t know if he had any that could push her away. And that scared him!

Well, time to face the music.

He opens the door to the restaurant and is greeted by the staff. _“Irasshaimase!”_ The young woman motions to the dining room, “please sit anywhere.” And after scanning it, realizes Lucy had not arrived yet.

Natsu nods to the staffer and takes a seat by a window so when the woman did arrive, she would easily see him. He pulls out his phone to check the time. _‘10 minutes early... okay see, Lucy’s probably still on her way.’_ After the server asks how many guests and is told two, places two menus on the table along with a glass of water. He thanks the girl and passes the time perusing their offerings.

Pictures of their drinks along with the decor was a dead giveaway as to why the place was called Shirokuma Cafe. Polar bear art, photographs, stuffed animals, and other decorative details were scattered through the room and on the walls. The hot drinks like coffee lattes had bear designs woven into the foam tops. It was adorable and Natsu wondered if Lucy liked this place because of the cute decor. Most likely, she did say this place was comfortable. Not a cafe he and Gray would hang out on their own, but perfect for a casual date.

Another greeting at the front causes Natsu to look up, and when he sees Lucy looking around, he waves. The blonde then points to him as she says something to the staffer, who nods and motions into the room. She smiles, thanks them, and walks over.

“Hi Natsu.” Lucy takes a seat across from him. “I’m sorry, I hope you weren’t waiting for too long.”

“No, no,” Natsu waves his hands to wipe the air clear, “I just arrived as well. It’s nice to see you again Lucy,” he smiles.

She blushes lightly. “I was so nervous on the way here, I almost turned around.”

“Ugh, me too,” he laughs, “but we made it. Please,” pushing a menu towards her, “order anything, my treat.”

After a few minutes, the pair place their orders with the server, then settle into their seats. The air between grew silent and thick with neither knowing where to start or what to say. Pink tinges blanket both their cheeks and eye contact was reserved for anywhere that wasn’t the other’s face. Till Natsu’s eyes track the movement of Lucy tucking a fallen lock of hair behind her ear.

He shakes his head, wake up dude! “S-So, Lucy, how’s your day so far?”

“Going well. We had a test today, but it was just an easy quiz. And you?”

“It’s great now that I’m here with you.”

That pulls a reinvigorated blush to form on Lucy’s cheeks. “At least I get my own seat this time.”

“Wo—w,” he chuckles, “okay I deserved that one. But I mean it. I may be nervous, no, let’s call it excited.” He smiles, “been a long time since I’ve gone out on a date.”

“You too, huh? Too busy with school as well?”

“Nah, well yeah, but more like no interest in it until now.”

Lucy rolls her eyes despite the hidden smile, “you can cool it on the pick-up lines Natsu. If I was interested in that kind of stuff, I would’ve just dated this guy Leo who’s been trying for over a year.”

“Sorry, Sorry, it’s the...”

“Nerves, uh-huh,” she giggles. “Just talk to me like any of your friends.”

“Oh, I can’t do that,” he smiles wide, “or we’d be bickering the whole time. Just wait until you meet my roommate, then you’ll believe me.”

Lucy laughs again, “alright, alright, how about we play twenty questions to get things started?”

Natsu opens his arms wide and motions with his hands, “bring it.”

The food and drinks arrive as the pair start a tit-for-tat round of questions to break the ice. Lucy starts it off sticking to simple topics about family, friends, and hobbies, mixed in with a joke or two from Natsu’s end. By the seventh round, it was evident in her dropped shoulders and the twinkle in her smile how relaxed Lucy was becoming. And the more she relaxed, so did he until it felt more like two long term friends just having a great Friday afternoon. She was a little taken aback to learn he’d been adopted, but in a good way. Natsu has such a positive outlook on life considering his had started off on a sad note. It was endearing. This man understood that humans aren’t bound to the circumstances of their birth and it resonated with her.

“You’ve really never heard the Heartfilia name before?” Natsu shakes his head a second time. “Wow... t-that’s—” Lucy leans in and rests her arms on the table, “if you’re telling me the truth, at least I know you’re not here because of it.”

His brows furrow. “What do you mean?”

“For money. My family is wealthy, but I wish to make my own way in life. It’s something I always worry about when meeting a guy.”

Natsu reaches out and places his hand on her arm. “Lucy,” he squeezes gently, “rich or poor, I don’t care. I’m here because I liked what I saw on that train. You were so, feisty it made me wanna get to know more about you.”

“Uh-huh, the big boobs wasn’t the incentive?”

“Well they would have made nice pillows if you’d been facing towards me,” he grins.

“Ugh!” She playfully scoffs with indignance. “Was my back not comfortable enough?!”

He leans in with a grin. “Oh very, along with your huggable waistline.”

Lucy’s face burns bright from his comments. She averts her eyes, “I can imagine seeing as how you fell asleep so easily.”

“It…”

Suddenly, a female voice cuts into the conversation and the pair stop what they were doing to look at the source. Lucy stares at the young woman who looked close in age, with curled blonde hair and a big smile on her face. She then turns back to Natsu, who had the most annoyed look on his face. Was this an ex-girlfriend? 

“Hi, Natsu! So, who’s the blonde?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> angst it coming....


	8. Chapter 8

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/629046640903405568/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

“As you can see Touka, I’m busy right now. So, if you could leave us alone, that’s be great.”

“Awww,” the woman pushes her way into Natsu’s lap and wraps her arms around his neck. “Don’t be so cruel lover.”

He unravels her arms and pushes her off. “I’m not your lover, I’m not even your boyfriend!”

“Natsu who is this person?”

The young man flinches, hearing the gritted tone in Lucy’s voice. “She’s no one.”

“Oh, don’t be coy. Just tell her the truth.” Touka grins at her rival. “I know it’s hard to understand and even I,” she swipes the air nonchalantly in exaggeration, “don’t know why I put up with a playboy, but I love my boyfriend, what can I say.”

“Touka, I swear to!”

Lucy pushes abruptly away from the table and stands up with her head lowered. “I knew it had to be too good to be true!” She fights back against the moisture building in her eyes. “Have fun with your _girlfriend_ , Natsu!” Storming outside of the cafe.

“You bitch!” Natsu scrambles to his feet and pushes Touka away to rush after Lucy. He tosses a handful of cash at the register before slamming his way through the front door.

“Lucy!” He screams after the blondes fleeting back and picks up the pace, “Lucy Wait! Please?!”

“Go away Natsu!” The woman screams in response, wiping the trailing tears from her face.

He catches up and grabs her arm, turning her to face him. “Please Lucy,” every ounce of his heart pleading with her. “She’s not my girlfriend! I swear, she’s just a crazy chick who keeps following me.”

“H-How can I trust you?!” She yanks her arm free. “I—, I gotta go. I gotta get out of here.” Lucy storms away towards the train station. Even though she barely knew him, that afternoon had been one of the best times she’s had in a long time, and now it was ruined.

“Lucy...” his head hangs, but fists clench at his sides. _Touka_... that girl was seriously pissing him off! Passing bystanders give Natsu a wide berth as he screams into the air. “Argh! What the fuck is your problem!” He whips around to face off against the woman who’d followed them. “I’ll never be your boyfriend! Get it through your head! And if you’ve ruined things for me with Lucy, so help me, I will turn you into the cops for harassment!”

“But Natsu...” Touka tries to grab his arm, but he flings it off and storms away.

“Leave! Me! Alone!”

Touka watches him walk away knowing this was not over yet, not by a long shot. If Natsu thought this would deter her, he was wrong. If anything, it only fueled her determination and now she had a new target in sight. Her lips curl up in a smirk as she pulls up Instagram and types in a name...

After leaving Natsu standing there in the square, Lucy decides to walk the few blocks home rather than chance running into him at the train station again. It might take her an hour instead of minutes, but the fresh air might do her some good and the cities distractions couldn’t hurt. Or so she thought as each couple she passed by stung just a little more... and a little more, turning a screw in her heart. She’d really hoped Natsu would be different than the others.

There was nothing in their first meeting, nor the phone call, or the entire lunch date up until that woman had walked in to make her think otherwise. Natsu was charming, albeit a bit goofy, and appeared just as nervous as she was. What playboy would act nervous unless it was part of his rouse? Lucy frowns. At least Loke was an upfront, flirty player. The idea that Natsu might‘ve been conning her the whole time really made her angry. She crosses her arms, rubbing them gently to soothe herself before the tears made another entrance. _‘Oh well,’_ at least she’d found this out early before he could do a significant amount of damage.

Back on the train, Natsu avoids eye contact with his fellow riders. He was in no mood to be spoken to let alone looked at wrong or he just might snap at an innocent person. Sadness and anger filled his mind as he reflected on the situation. There had to be a way to fix this! On the walk from the station to the apartment, he sends another apology text to Lucy swearing up and down that Touka really was just some stalker-ish woman who wouldn’t leave him alone and to please give him a chance to prove it. To no avail. His text is delivered but goes unread.

He skulks through the front door and heads straight for his room, passing an awaiting Gray along the way. The man leans up against his door frame before he is able to shut the door.

“I take it went badly?”

“Tch, but not in the way you’re thinking. That chick Touka showed up and told her I was her boyfriend.”

“And that Lucy girl believed it?”

“Yeah...” Natsu sighs and plops onto his bed. “I-I just don’t understand why, I mean everything was going so well. Ugh!” He cradled his face in his hands. “Lucy is amazing. But I guess it wasn’t enough to show her I’m genuine.”

“Dude, she barely knows you, so how would she know who to believe. And this is partially your fault for leading that psycho on.”

Natsu jumps to his feet. “How the fuck have I led her on?!”

“By not flat out turning her down in the beginning you gave her hope! Instead of befriending her, you should have listened to us when we told you to stay away!”

“She seemed fine at first, just wanted to be friends...”

“Are you that fucking stupid?! She had crazy vibes just oozing from her. We saw it and you’re just the dumb blind bat who didn’t. Remember with Lisanna last year? Touka harassed her just for talking to you. It’s probably why you’ve struck out for two years with women. She chases them away if they even look at you.”

“This is just crazy.”

“Yeah, it is, but still true.”


	9. Chapter 9

<https://petri808.tumblr.com/post/629760346315440128/1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10-11-12>

“So, how’d it—” Levy pauses mid bounce as she takes in the state of her friend. Petechial hemorrhages in the eyes, puffiness, and Lucy’s lips were curled into a frown. She watches as the woman tosses her keys into a little bowl next to the door, then slumps onto the couch. “Oh no! What happened Lu?! Do I need to kill someone?!”

Lucy pulls her legs up and wraps her arms around her knees, resting her chin on them. “It started out really well... We were totally clicking, until a woman showed up claiming to be his girlfriend.

“Are you serious?!” Levy takes a place next to her friend and hugs the woman. “But he seemed like such a nice one.”

“I thought so too. I mean he tried to say the girl was lying, but how do I know what’s the truth? Ugh! Men! Why did I even... I mean a stranger on a train, what was I thinking?!” She sighs and closes her eyes to hold back the tears. “I wonder how much of what he told me was even true.”

“Like what?”

“Oh, he played it re—al smooth, convincing me he was nervous and hasn’t had a girlfriend in a long time. Said he’s adopted and had no idea who I was. Tch, maybe he really is after money?”

“Well, we don’t know anything for sure so try not to beat yourself up over this. Right now, you have his word against hers.”

“It was the first time in so— long that I even thought about getting into a relationship. But I don’t know, maybe I should stick to my plan and just stay away from it for now.”

“Look on the bright side Lu, at least you found this out early before you were really invested in the guy. And only you can decide what to do about future relationships, but I’d suggest you not close up your heart just yet.”

“You’re probably right. Maybe I did overreact. He was pissed about her intrusion, so maybe he was telling the truth.”

“Let things cool off, maybe do a little more digging or something, stalk his social media, I don’t know,” Levy chuckles. “But for now, just focus on school?”

The blonde hugs her friend. “Thanks Levy, I’m so lucky to have you as a friend.”

“Aww, the feelings mutual hun.”

Over the next few days, Natsu sent Lucy text messages and she read, but never answers any of them. They’d started off as full-blown stories and apologies begging for a second chance, swearing on his mother’s life he was telling the truth about Touka. To be fair, none of his social media’s held any information, no couples pictures, relationship status, or even Touka listed as a friend he was following. But Lucy knew that wasn’t concrete evidence proving his innocence. He could simply be keeping her off of the blogs to keep up his player lifestyle. There was a plethora of information like his workplace and friends that she could contact to confirm his story, but then again, they might lie for him too. So, it was better to let things go for now.

She had a couple of hours to kill before her next class, so Lucy goes to the campus cafe for a bite to eat. It was a nice, warm afternoon, perfect to take advantage of the outside seating. With her sandwich and bubble drink at her fingertips, she cracks open her textbook for the next class to get a head start.

“Excuse me?” A familiar voice requests her attention. Lucy looks up to see Touka standing next to the table. “May I sit? I feel you deserve a better explanation of what happened that day.”

Lucy wasn’t really interested in what the woman had to say, but being polite, she gestures to an open seat across the table. “If you’re here to apologize for Natsu, save it cause I don’t want to hear it.”

“No, no!” The woman waves her hands wiping the air clear. “I should apologize to you for my actions. It was rude of me to cut in like that. I should have waited and confronted him in private, but I was just concerned because he was leading you on and didn’t want you to fall for it. So many have fallen in the past only to end up with their hearts broken.”

“Oh.” Lucy sits back in her seat, struck by the new information. How many women has he done this to before her?! “Wow— in that case I should be the one thanking you.” She shifts in her seat. “If you don’t mind me asking, why do you put up with Natsu if he’s a womanizer?”

Touka sighs as if her mind slipped into a blissful state. “The simple answer is I love him.” She blushes. “We’ve been together for so long and through so much, even though he’s always been like this, I just can’t bring myself to give him up. You have to admit, he has a lot of qualities that just draws you in.”

“Ugh, I can’t disagree there, but still, I could never put up with a cheater. I’ve had enough power trip males in my life that if they can’t respect me, then they don’t need me.”

“I wish I was as strong as you Lucy, s-sorry, sorry! Is it okay to call you Lucy? I don’t want to overstep my welcome here.”

“It’s fine. In fact, we never have a proper introduction.” Lucy smiles and sticks her hand out, “Lucy Hearfilia, it’s nice to meet you.”

The woman shakes it with a smile, “Touka Shiromajo, it’s nice to meet you too. Well, I should let you get back to your lunch Lucy. But I’m glad we had this opportunity to clear the air. I hope there’s no hard feelings.”

“Not as far as I’m concerned.”

“Wonderful! You have a great rest of your afternoon!” Touka waves as she skips away.

Lucy watches the woman until she rounds the buildings corner, still analyzing their brief conversation. Like Levy had said, it’s all Touka’s word against Natsu, and both of them were either sincere or bold-faced lying to her. How is she supposed to tell the difference? Maybe after class she’ll search the woman’s social media now that she has a name to go by.

If Touka was telling the truth, being a woman, Lucy felt a little bad for her. The woman must really love Natsu to chase after him and put up with his misgivings. And again, if true, she’d thrown herself into the fire in order to save Lucy, a total stranger from being hurt. She had to give the woman some credit for that. But there was one thing nagging her, was their meeting today random? How did Touka know where she went to school or more so to find her at this cafe? Lucy chalked it up to coincidence, perhaps the woman had looked her up on social media too.

 _‘Social media,’_ Lucy chuckles and bites into her sandwich. Is anything really private anymore?

~~ XX ~~

Once out of sight, Touka squeals giddily. “Foolish woman!” It was almost too easy to get Lucy on her side. She was sure by now the image of Natsu was thoroughly tarnished and he’ll never convince the woman to give him another chance. “Well, that’s that,” she rubs her hands together as if washing away dirt. “My work here is done.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gomen for the late post ;-; school and writing projects be piling up. Please enjoy! <3

_‘Come on, come on, come on, Lucy please pick up!’_

_“Sorry I’m not available to take your call. Please leave a message at the beep.”_

“Fuck!” Natsu clicks off before the beep and chucks his phone at his bed. He’d already left numerous voice mails and text messages over the last week, the desperation growing with each one, but they’d all gone unanswered or unread. If he left anymore Lucy just might block him and he didn’t want that to happen.

All he needed was a chance, one chance. Even though their interactions were few between meeting on the train, the phone, and the cafe, it still should have provided him with some credibility. So how after just one encounter could she believe Touka over him? He didn’t understand. Of course, Gray’s take on it all was well, women tend to be more emotional. Maybe Lucy’s decision to react wasn’t because she necessarily believed Touka’s story. Perhaps she’s been cheated on before or slighted by a guy. Natsu shouldn’t try to rationalize it based on only his own experiences. His friend might be right, but he still wanted to hear it from Lucy’s own mouth. Didn’t he deserve at least that much?

Why hasn’t she blocked him yet? Did it mean she was still thinking about everything, processing it, or simply hadn’t had a chance to? Okay, that last one doesn’t make any sense considering how easy it easy to block a number on a cellphone. It gave him hope things weren’t over yet, but that unknown made it worse, like being left standing in the cold waiting for the rain to stop falling. Ugh! When will this storm pass? He needed answers or this’ll slowly drive him insane!

So, two days later he makes a crazy decision. “Yes,” he tells Gray, “so don’t stay up waiting for me.”

“You’re an idiot, you know that, right?” Gray crosses his arms, “that’s basically stalking, as in you could go to jail if she complains.”

“I know the consequences, but I don’t see it like that. I just want to talk to her and if she tells me to fuck off, I’ll leave, but at least I got my answer.”

The man shakes his head and starts to walk away. “Never thought I’d see you go so nuts over a girl man. But good luck.”

Night after night, Natsu rides the train at the same time as their first meeting, hoping to run into Lucy. He knew it was a long shot, that their meeting may have been completely at random and she rarely caught the train so late at night. Which made sense considering the dangers of a single woman out alone. But it was his only lead to follow. Her campus was simply too large to wander aimlessly on and he had no idea where she lives. He was determined to see this through no matter how long it took.

Such resolution began to falter by the end of the second week when no sight or sound of the blonde crossed his path. He would sit there growing more and more despondent, getting onto the train and off to start the cycle again in the same route. Even other daily commuters started to notice this odd man sitting on a bench with his head kept low, only to look up at the sound of the doors opening. Natsu must have looked pathetic, and sad, a poor miserable creature lost in a sea of train riders with a story no one knew but could guess based on his appearance.

“Dude, it’s been a month! Just give up already!”

“No way! Tonight, could be the night!”

And it was.

It’d become such a routine, like one of Pavlov’s conditioning experiments. At the sound of the trains door, Natsu’s head pops up ready to scan all the incoming riders. It was nearing 10:30 pm with only one more route for the evening before he’d have to give up and try again tomorrow... but there she was.

Lucy walks into the door at the other end of the car and doesn’t see him immediately. By that hour there’s only a small number of riders so most of the seats were open and she quickly sits down on one. Natsu jumps up and rushes over in his excitement, like a puppy whose master had just come home.

He drops down in a crouch before Lucy and grabs her hand before she can resist or stop him. “Please, don’t scream or anything, I just wanna talk.”

“Oh my god Natsu, you scared the hell out of me!” She tries to pull her hand away, but he simply holds on tighter. “Natsu, there’s a reason I haven’t answered your calls, so take a hint.”

“Oh, come on Lucy, you never even gave me a chance to prove I’m innocent! How could you believe a woman who you just met over me, I thought we at least had a small connection between us.”

Lucy sees a few other riders staring in their direction. In embarrassment, she lowers her voice and grits out a response. “Let go of my hand, get off the floor and sit on the bench before I scream for help.”

“Y-Yes, ma’am,” he scrambles to his feet and takes a seat beside her.

The woman lets out an exasperated sigh. “I really don’t know how you can prove anything to me Natsu. I don’t know either of you, so to protect myself, it’s safer to just walk away.”

“Then get to know me, Luce. That’s all I’m asking for and you’ll see it was all a lie.”

“How would I know you’re not still seeing Touka? It’s not like we’d be together 24/7, so there’s plenty of opportunities for you to juggle the both of us.”

Ugh! He runs his hand down his face in frustration. “Touka is _not_ my girlfriend, has _never_ been my girlfriend, and _will never_ be my girlfriend. She’s been stalking me for a couple years now and you’re not the first girl she’s chased away because she thought they were a rival.”

“Pfft.” Lucy takes out her phone, pulling up Instagram, and tapping away furiously. “Then explain this,” she shows him Touka’s profile. “Pictures of you two that looks like you’re a couple,” she scrolls a few posts down, “and again here, a comment by a N_dragneel with heart shapes. And then!” She changes to that persons profile, shoving her phone in his face, “are you telling me this isn’t you?”

Natsu stares at the profile which appeared to be filled with pictures of him and his life, along with the description stating Natsu loves Touka. “It’s not me,” he states calmly and takes out his own phone, pulling up his Instagram account. “This is me,” he shows her.

“How do I know this isn’t a side account?”

Again, he sighs and clicks on the account information. “See, I have one side blog to post dragon art, and that’s it. She created that fake blog with my name.”

“And the photo’s?!”

“Photoshop or some other free app anyone can download. Lucy I’m telling you the truth, and this isn’t the first time I’m hearing this.” He groans, “this’ll be the third blog I’ll have to report for stealing my identify.”

The tell-tale ding of the trains information board signals they’d arrived at Lucy’s stop. “Look Natsu, I-I just don’t know what to make of all this.” She stands to leave, but he corners her.

“Just one shot, Lucy please! I’ll introduce you my friends, hell I can introduce you to another woman Touka’s harassed and you’ll have to see I’m telling you the truth!”

“Natsu, move.” She clenches her fists in frustration and her adrenaline is making her body shake. “I-I have to go!”

“But Lucy...”

“Please,” moisture builds in her eyes. “Natsu get out of the way.”

Heartbroken and dejected, his shoulders slump and arms drop to his sides as he steps away to let her pass. Lucy adjusts her backpack and starts to walks away but pauses just outside of the door. Without turning around, “Even if you’re telling me the truth Natsu, I have to think long and hard if I’d want to deal with all this drama. I’m sorry.”

The doors close and with it the last pieces still hanging on in Natsu’s heart shatter. She was right. How fair is it to Lucy to be caught in the middle of this stalking war with Touka? He shambles back to his seat and drops as the train moves on to his stop. All he could do was wait and see what she decided. Is he worth the investment? 


	11. Chapter 11

The lecture hall they were in was one of those large amphitheater types that gave the students a semi-anonymity from the teacher far up front if you stayed towards the back. Gray preferred it that way, but strangely a girl he knows, that tends to sit up front was right in front of him today. He wouldn’t say they were friends, but after a couple of classes together, they were comfortable enough to engage in conversations. His eyes narrow in, studying her odd behavior as she typed furiously on the phone held low in her lap. Something clearly had her agitated.

“Psst,” he leans in whispering quietly so as not to attract attention. “Psst, Levy, where’s the fire?”

Without turning around, the woman holds up a pointer finger, effectively hushing him. “One second,” she mumbles, too engrossed in whatever conversation she was already in.

He sits back in wait and goes back to listening to the teacher. That was fine with him, considering he’d only been interested because it wasn’t her norm. Maybe she was fighting with her parents or boyfriend and that was none of his business. But no matter how hard he tried to focus on the lecture, his eyes kept shifting back to Levy every time she moved. Ugh! It was distracting! She’d shift in her chair, at times typing slower and relaxed, then switch instantly all hunched into another round of animated typing.

“Oi!” He whispers through clenched teeth. “At least sit still, you’re kinda distracting.”

Levy stops typing in a huff, but just as she’s about to tell him to back off, she notices a couple other students around them not so subtly staring at her as well. “Sorry,” she mumbles, “it’s just my best friend and she freaking out right now.”

“Doesn’t she know you’re in class?”

“Yeah, but,” Levy sighs, “it’s complicated, okay. I’m sorry if I was being distracting.”

“It’s fine, but are you okay?”

She looks to her phone, then teacher, biting her lip in debate. The professor hadn’t noticed anything amiss yet and since she was running out of options... Levy quickly shoots off a final text to her friend, bundles up her stuff, climbing under the desks that separated them and takes a seat next to Gray. Being small had its advantages. She takes one last look towards the front to make sure the teacher was none the wiser before relaxing with a long exhale.

In a low tone, she leans closer to hide their conversation. “My friend would kill me if she knew I was talking to anyone else about this, but I’m running out of arguments. She been freaking out about a guy and is torn about giving him a second chance.”

“What, did he cheat on her? Cause I’d say get rid of the loser.”

“It’s, um, more complicated— we’re not actually sure if he did cheat or not.”

“Still, if there’s even a question, it’s better to just not deal with a guy like that.”

“Oh, I totally agree! I’d normally be the first to say dump the loser. But I don’t know...” she shrugs, “I did some digging on my own and after the stuff I saw, I’m inclined to believe his story. She was really excited about Natsu too.”

Gray suddenly places his hand on her arm, “hold up, did you say Natsu? Is your friends name Lucy?”

“Yeah! How’d you know?!”

“Shhh!”

The pair stiffen at the sound of a fellow students voice and hunch closer to quiet their sound. “How do you know Natsu or Lucy?”

“Well,” Gray chuckles, “that idiot is my best friend and he’s all messed up over this Lucy friend of yours.”

“Not!” Levy crosses her arms, “then why didn’t I see you in any of his Insta pics?”

“I hate taking pictures so I’m the guy behind many of those photos.”

“Okay, that could be true. Then, um, how’d they meet? If he’s your best friend you’d know details.”

Gray sits back and grins, “I’m the one who found her note in his pocket. If it wasn’t for me, it would’a got washed and they’d never met up again.”

“Pfft. Okay, I believe you cause I remember her telling me that’s what he told her.” She sits back as well, “guess this really is a small world. Do you think she should give him a second chance? Wait,” she waves her hand, wiping the statement away, “actually, I want more details, like do you know who this Touka girl is?”

“Psycho girl, yeah I do. She’s been stalking him for a couple of years, always seems to show up when she thinks there’s a rival. To be honest I’m not even sure how she found out about that cafe date, but I assume she follows him around.”

“They’ve never dated?”

“Nope. See, Natsu’s a friendly guy, very naive about women or people in general. You could say he’s the type who just likes to be friends with everyone. So, at first, he tolerated her since she was nice, kind of bright and seemed intelligent, absolutely no red flags in the beginning... that is until Lisanna came along.”

“Lisanna?”

“She was just a girl in one of his class about a year and a half ago.” He waves his hand curtly, “no romantic interest, just lab partners and acquaintances like how we’re chatting right now, but in Touka’s eyes, she was competition. After that, psycho came out. She started doing stuff like show up whenever they were together, claiming to be his girlfriend, approaching Lisanna outside of school, we also found her fake Insta page, well the first one anyways, Natsu said Lucy showed him a new one. Touka finally backed off when Lisanna’s real boyfriend showed up one day and told her to stop bothering his girl.”

“Wo—w, this is not helping actually. I mean, she sounds irritating.”

“She’s never done anything more than creepy stuff so far, but yeah, I never liked her. I told him he should’a set her straight right from the beginning but noooo, he felt bad for her.”

“This is so much to process, I feel like I’m in a Korean drama.”

“Tell me about it, I mean my girl is kinda clingy but nowhere near psycho stalker chick. Hey, tell ya what since class is almost over. How about we grab lunch after, and I’ll fill you in on any details you want. Whatever you wanna know about Natsu.”

“No bro-code between you guys?”

“Tch, he’ll owe me big time when this is over.”

“Sounds like a plan. “Levy chuckles, “they’ll both owe us something.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry a bit of short chapter this week :)


	12. Chapter 12

“Lucy, Lucy, Lucy!” Levy plops onto the couch next to her friend. She grabs the blondes arm and shakes it. “Omg you won’t believe what happened today at school!”

“What? What? The teacher you hate croaked?”

“Pfft, I wish. No! I met Natsu’s roommate! Well, technically I’ve known the guy for like a year from school, we were lab partners, remember Gray, I think I mentioned him, anyways, yeah, he totally gave me all the details I wanted to know!”

But at the name Natsu, Lucy frowns and sits back. “Lev, you know I just wanna move on from this...”

“Just hear me out, I promise it’ll be worth it.” She leans in, “trust me.”

Lucy rolls her eyes. “Okay, fine. Spill. What did Gray have to say?”

“So... starting with that Touka chick. Everything Natsu said was true. You’re not the first girl she’s harassed over him, in fact he offered to contact the other girl if you’d like to ask the person yourself.”

“That’s not necessary, I believe it.”

“He also confirmed that the profiles you saw on Ig are fake and how she’s been stalking him for a couple years now.”

“So, Gray’s just his roommate?”

“No, he said they’ve been friends since middle school, so he knows Natsu well.”

“Anything else?”

“The stuff he told you about his family are true. Um, he works at a place called Yousei Mart, and that he’s an idiot but a good guy that is just really naive sometimes. The more he talked, the more I remembered him mentioning his roommate before. Like venting about stuff. Anyway, he said Natsu’s been completely distressed over all this and he thinks you should give his friend a second chance. I think so too, Lu, cause I believed him that Natsu’s a great guy and this whole Touka business is just unfortunate.”

The blonde pulls her legs up onto the couch, wraps her arms around them and rests her chin on her knees, thinking about everything she’d learned. Did she really want to deal with the baggage? What if Touka continues to harass her or them? It would be unfortunate to lose a guy like Natsu, because he really did seem like one of the good guys. She pulls up the memories of him on the train when he’d cornered her... _‘he was really devastated...’_ and to do what he’d done, the amount of time he spent chasing and waiting for her, he must really like her to go that far.

“Well, Lu? What do you think?”

She’d definitely be using a higher standard to judge him, so he’ll need to be very convincing to gain her trust a second time, but, “I guess it couldn’t hurt to give him another chance.”

“Then there’s just one last thing for you to do.”

“Ugh,” she groans, “call him.” Lucy picks up her phone and dials Natsu’s number, but he doesn’t pick up. So, she hangs up without leaving a message. She made the first call, now it was his turn to respond if he wanted a second chance.

Approximately thirty minutes later an out-of-breath Natsu is on the phone. “Sorry Lucy! I was in class and the teacher is a real dick about cellphones.” He’d literally run out the room the second the lecture was over to call her back.

“It’s fine, I thought that might be the case.”

“Did you wanna talk to me about something?”

“Yeah, first have you spoken to your roommate at all today?”

“Um... no, why is something wrong with him?”

“Well, in that case...” she pauses and takes a deep breath. “So, turns out your roommate and my roommate have a class together, actually have had several, so they know each other and today they talked about us.”

“Really...” guess he’ll be calling Gray after this phone call!

“Look, bottom line is I believe my friend and since she believes your roommate about you and that girl... I’ll give you another chance. But remember! It’s not because I trust you yet it’s because I trust them.”

“I’ll take it! I understand totally and I promise I’ll do anything to prove to you that you can trust me.”

“I mean, I’m not sure how, but...”

“Um...” Natsu thinks fast, “are you busy right now?”

“Now? Um, not really...”

“I gotta run or I’ll be late for work, but can you meet me at Yousei Mart near Haramachi park as soon as you can?”

“Why?”

“Please?? I’ll buy you dinner too for coming.”

 _‘Ugh...’_ “Okay, I’ll get ready and head over.”

“Thank you!! I’m just really happy you’re giving me a chance Lucy. Okay, I’ll see you soon!”

Lucy hangs up the phone and lets her roommate know she was heading out to see Natsu. The location he’d asked her to go to was several blocks away and takes her 20 minutes to get there. So, as she walked, she did her best to keep her cool. Half of her was thrilled to try again while the other half still apprehensive. Natsu had sounded so excited too, she could almost picture the man doing a victory dance the moment they’d ended the phone call. But where was this place that he wanted her to go to? She knew it was like a convenience store, maybe that’s where he works? Must be if he’d said he needed to get to work and still wanted to see her.

“Irasshaimase!” Lucy hears as she enters the store. A bit odd for a convenience store, but welcoming, nonetheless. She’s greeted by an employee, a red headed woman.

“May I help you find anything?”

“Actually, I’m here to see Natsu. He asked me to come.”

“Oh! You must be Lucy! Please, follow me,” the woman gestures, “he’s in the back working on inventory. My name is Erza by the way and we’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Really?” Hopefully nothing bad...

“Oh, yes. The pretty blonde he met on a train. The guy can’t shut up about you,” Erza laughs. “It was just weird, well new because we’ve never seen him so excited over a girl before.”

Lucy blushes from the compliment. “How long have you worked with Natsu?”

“Hmm, four years, I think. He started when he was still in high school, but I’ve been here a little longer.” They reach the back area and find Natsu hunched over some boxes tagging items. “Here he is, Natsu, your friend Lucy is here.”

“It’s okay for me to be back here?”

“I don’t see why not,” the woman shrugs. “We’re a pretty tight-knit crew here, like a family, so it’s also pretty lax how things are run.”

“Oh. Okay, thank you Erza.”

“You’re welcome. Stay as long as you like.”

Once the woman goes back to the front, Lucy turns to Natsu who was waiting patiently. “Well, I’m here. What did you want me to see?”

“That was part of it,” he smiles. “You said you didn’t know if you could trust me, so what could be better than introducing you to people who know me best. And people like Erza, she’s got no problem telling it like she sees it. If I was an asshole, she would have been the first to tell you to run away.”

“Yeah, she mentioned you’ve been co-workers for a few years. She seems nice, but I can see what you mean cause she looks tough too.”

Natsu laughs, “that’s an understatement. Oh! Come with me,” he grabs her hand and pulls her along, “gramps is still in the office, so you should meet him!”

“Gramps?”

“He’s the owner. Real name’s Makarov but he tells us to call him Gramps. He really is like a grandfather figure to us. Gave me a job at 17 and I’ve loved every minutes being here!”

She follows along, allowing him to hold her hand. Lucy couldn’t lie that his larger hand was nice and warm, and it felt snug and secure together. _‘Stick to your guns woman!’_ She chides herself in an effort to fight the emotions bubbling to the surface. What was it about this man’s damn smile that made her heart thump!

Natsu knocks on the doorframe before going in. “Gramps! There someone I want you to meet.”

The older make looks up from his paperwork. “What is it brat, I’m busy here.”

“Be nice old man, this is that girl Lucy I told you about.”

“Oh... the elusive Lucy you’ve sold your soul for.” He snickers. “Welcome, my dear, it’s nice to finally meet the woman who wrangle our Natsu.”

“W-Wrangle?” She sputters. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about. We barely had one date.”

“I’ve known this kid for a few years and he’s never so much as looked at a woman. I thought he was gay for the longest time till you came along.” He grins. “And by the looks of you, he lucked into a good one.”

The blush on Lucy’s face increases. “I don’t know about that. I mean I’m nothing special.”

“Lucy,” Makarov leans into his desk, “may I call you Lucy?” Once she nods, he continues. “Never sell yourself short if someone gives you a compliment. Take it from this old geezer, when a man is willing to give you his heart, that means you’re pretty special in their eyes.”

She had nothing else to say against such logic. “Thank you, gramps.”

“You’re very welcome,” he smiles. “Now get out, I have work to do.”

For a few more hours, Lucy hangs out with Natsu in the back while he works, and as promised, he buys her a bento dinner from the restaurant next door. Throughout the evening, his co-worker Erza and one more named Mira drops by to check on them or add to the conversation. She learned a lot about him from them because they were not shy about embarrassing the man. It was hilarious!

But best of all, Mira is the sister of the girl who was harassed by Touka. According to the woman, Touka had started off with the same tactics when she’d thought Natsu was seeing her sister Lisanna. Showing up, trying to talk to her, coming off all sweet and innocent. But Lisanna had a boyfriend who eventually scared the girl off. With Mira’s help, Lucy could finally be confident that Natsu had been telling the truth all along.

When the store closes, Natsu insists on walking Lucy home due to the late hour. He pays for them to take the train to make it a faster and safer trip. So, once settled in their seats, she sighs and turns to him. “I believe you now,” her voice is kept soft and low from the other travelers. “You were telling me the truth.”

It was like a wave of relief washes over him, but in that moment, it wasn’t time for an _I told you so_ , so he just grins. “Movie date next?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for your patience with this late chapter! I had some frustrating family drama pop up so I wasn't able to finish it until today. Enjoy!


	13. Chapter 13

Natsu and Lucy take two was progressing slowly, but on an upward trend. After meeting his friends at work, and a couple of days later his roommate Gray Fullbuster, Lucy had been cautiously optimistic in trusting her friend Levy’s suggestion of giving Natsu the second chance. Yes, it was his friends she was meeting, and they could have been lying to her, but her gut told her they were telling the truth about him and of Touka. The final nail in that coffin came via Mira’s sister Lisanna who met with Lucy and happily divulged her own dealings with the crazy woman.

Despite knowing all the trouble and frustration caused, Lucy felt a little bad for Touka. Natsu was a really great catch after all, handsome, smart, and fun to be around, it was easy to understand why Touka had fallen in love with him. She also just didn’t have it in her to treat the woman badly. It was irritating yes, Lucy knew she was still following them, but unless Touka gave her a solid reason to get angry, she’ll continue to just ignore the woman and go on with her own life which wasn’t revolving around Natsu anytime soon. Did she like him, okay yes, Lucy could admit her growing affinity for the man, but school still held top priority and Natsu felt the same way.

Throughout the rest of the semester, the developing couple did much of their interactions by phone or chatting online between classes and work. Once a week when Natsu had a day off, they would meet up and go on a date. Sometimes the movies or a meal as a couple, laser tag was a lot of fun, and at other times with friends to a karaoke bar for some laughs. Let’s just say his singing voice was questionable, but because Natsu wasn’t afraid of making fun of himself, it was still worth the entertainment value.

Tonight, was one of those nights and they along with Gray, Ezra, and Levy found themselves in a hidden, cozy third-floor bar that another one of his friends named Cana works at. Lucy really liked the places atmosphere because it was relaxing, plus if Cana was actually working the shift, the bar maid slipped them free drinks or extra songs to sing. They’d consumed a few drinks and settled in, to chill before the real rush of finals prep was about to kick in.

“Psst,” Gray leans in, keeping his voice low so only the group could hear him. “Did anyone see that?”

“Yeah,” Natsu rolls his eyes, “she popped her head in the door.”

“Who?” Levy asks.

“Touka,” Natsu responds. “She’s still following us.”

Lucy sighs, “if we’re with others she doesn’t approach, so she probably saw you guys and left.”

“Why,” Levy questions. “Does she bother you if you’re alone?”

“Yeah,” Lucy answers. “If she tries to talk to us, we just run away so it doesn’t turn into a problem. She hasn’t chased us, but it’s still irritating.”

Ezra frowns, “maybe you should report her to the authorities?”

“On what grounds?” Natsu chimes back. “I tried once, but because she’s never done anything criminal, they can’t do anything about it.”

“Well that sucks.” Ezra crosses her arms. “Hopefully she gives up at some point once she realizes you two are getting serious.”

“Yeah...”

When the bar closes for the night, the group leaves together and separate once they reach street level. Erza walks since she lives only a block away. Levy had plans to see her boyfriend and takes a cab, leaving just the trio. It was too late to catch a train, so Natsu and Gray decide to walk Lucy home first, then they’ll continue on to their own apartment. It’s about five blocks to her dorm building and they chat as they walk, mostly about school and the upcoming testing period.

But after just a couple of blocks, they again realized they were being followed. Lucy grips tighter to Natsu’s hand. “I don’t want her to figure out where I live,” she whispers to the group.

“Agreed.” Natsu looks around, thinking of their options. “You know what, I’ll just pay for a cab to get us all home, that’ll be safer.”

“You’re probably right,” Gray agrees with his friend. “That psycho already knows where we live, but it would be good for her to find out about Lucy.”

“Are you sure?” Lucy asks. “I don’t want to take advantage...”

“Nonsense,” Natsu squeezes her hand. “Your safety is more important.”

“Thank you,” she blushes.

They stop in a lit area and hail the first available taxi they see. As they drive away, Lucy turns back one last time to look and notices Touka standing around the corner just staring at the car. It sends a shiver down her spine. Up until now, she’d tried so hard to empathize with the woman or simply ignore the behaviors, but it really was getting creepy. How Touka always knew where they were, was still a mystery because she and Natsu both agreed not to post about their whereabouts until after the fact. Take tonight, for instance. Neither posted on social media about going to a bar nor anything while they were actually there. Lucy had planned to post pictures once she’d gone home. That left the option that Touka literally was staking out one or the other constantly and just following their movements. Or if not them, known associates.

“Good night, guys,” Lucy tells them before giving Natsu a quick kiss and exiting the cab. She was pretty sure Touka hadn’t been able to follow the cab, saw no other car following it, and there’s no wat the woman could have run fast enough to catch up.

“Good night, Lucy,” the men both respond. Natsu instructed the driver not to leave until Lucy was safely in her building. So, once that was the case, they finally drive away.

Inside her dorm, Lucy locks the door behind her for good measure. The building required access keys to get in, but it wasn’t impossible to sneak through when other residents were coming and going. She plops down onto the couch just to calm her nerves before jumping in the shower. This whole Touka business was really... Lucy groans out loud. “Maybe I should notify security to beware of her.” Deep down this had always been a concern of hers when considering to date Natsu. She’d wanted to avoid the drama yet in the beginning underestimated the headache it would bring. And now that her feelings for the man had grown, she couldn’t just walk away. Lucy sighs again and pushes off the couch towards her bedroom. _‘Let’s hope Erza’s right and Touka will give up soon.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gonna do a bonus Halloween chapter as next week's update :)


	14. bonus halloween chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shibuya's Halloween is literally the biggest Halloween gathering in Japan. They believe that in 2019, the crowds had swelled to over 1 million young people. Just Google Shibuya & Halloween and you'll see. I was supposed to be there this year but due to Covid my study abroad program got cancelled :-; so now I gotta live vicariously through Natsu and Lucy xD
> 
> Happy Halloween!
> 
> warning, this is the calm before the storm.......

The biggest party in Tokyo was for a western holiday called Halloween, and the streets surrounding the heart of Shibuya that Saturday were literally crawling with a million young adults in every kind of costume you could imagine! Most of the revelers had no idea as to the origins of this holiday. All they cared about was dressing up and having a good time, including Lucy and her friends who’d dressed up as their favorite manga characters from Eden’s Zero. The businesses lining the streets in the area were used to the onslaught and welcomed it because it meant a nice chunk of revenue, while authorities did their best to control the crowds.

The group started off with Lucy, Levy, Erza, Gajeel, and Gray, but over time as others showed up or they ran into more friends, the groups numbers ebbed and flowed. Gray was the first to take off to meet his girlfriend Juvia, and once Natsu was off of work and joined them, Lucy and he split off to cruise by themselves for a while.

“Wow it’s so eerie how much you guys look like Shiki and Rebecca!”

“Thanks Mira,” Lucy blushes.

“Tch, I may look like the guy, but I’m not as dopey as him,” Natsu retorts. “He’s taking too damn long to make it official with Rebecca.”

“Don’t mind him,” Lucy giggles, “Natsu ships Shicca hard. But it’s even funnier to watch him and Gray argue over Weiszmura.”

“That’s because Gray is a blind bat who won’t admit they match!”

“Okay,” Mira laughs, “put the canons away. Are you two gonna check out the BUMP party at Womb nightclub?”

“Maybe a little later.” Lucy answers for them. “I heard they had some decent bands this year, but I’d rather go somewhere a little smaller like Sonidos.”

“Oh, yeah? Lisanna’s boyfriend Bixlow is the DJ there tonight.”

Lucy looks to Natsu, “we definitely should stop by and say hi.”

“Agreed.”

“Well it was nice bumping into you. I need to meet up with Laxus so you two have fun! I’ll catch you later!” Mira waves as she rejoins the flood of passerby’s.

Natsu takes Lucy’s hand and the couple continued walking around with no real destination. They stop in open stores to browse or grab yummy-looking finger foods from street vendors along the way. Despite the chaos around them, this was turning into a nice reprieve from their daily lives. It was already 1 am, but from the amount of activity going on, it was easy to lose track of time.

“Look, look,” Lucy points while dragging Natsu with her. “Photo booth!”

“Aww, really?” He whines, though the smile never wavered on his face.

“Yup!” She pulls him in and fishes out a bill from her wallet for the machine.

“Chi-zu!”

The pair chuckle and pose for the five shutter clicks. Each pose varying until the last one ending with a kiss from Natsu and genuinely surprised expression on Lucy’s face. It wasn’t their first kiss, but this would be a memorable one. For a few seconds as the machine printed out the slip of photos, Natsu holds her gaze, sweeping his thumb gently along her flushed cheek. There was a sense of intimacy in these confined booths where many a couple had hidden away from the public for this very kind of very moment.

“Thank you,” he smiles, eyes soft and pure of appreciation.

“For what?” Genuinely unsure of the reason.

“Giving me a second chance. These past few months have been the happiest times of my life and it’s all thanks to meeting you on that train.”

“I’m really glad too,” Lucy smiles sweetly. “Really... _really_ glad,” she breathes out as she moves in to kiss him again.

“Excuse me?” A loud knocking sound stops them. “There’s other people waiting to use the machine!”

“Whoops. To be continued,” she gives Natsu just a quick peck and the pair get out of the booth. They apologize to the next group in line and race off hand in hand, laughing. That had been exhilarating!

Lucy’s heart was still racing even though they were long gone from the photo booth. She and Natsu had been taking things extra slow because of her earlier concerns. Aside from dates and a few kisses here and there, they’d never gone much further and she wondered who was the one holding back. Was it really her or was it actually him because he was too nervous to lose her? Tonight... in that booth... if they weren’t in public... her body flushes wildly just from the thought of it. Okay, so maybe she’s been dying to take their relationship further. Maybe not sex— _yet_ , soon, or _maybe... ‘argh! Not now!’_ Lucy scolds her libido. But a make out session was a very tempting idea!

They check out Lisanna and Bixlow for a short time at Sonidos, before briefly hooking back up with Levy and Gajeel for some crepes. That’s when Levy quietly informs Lucy that she’ll be crashing at her boyfriend’s house instead of going back to the dorm. “You know... for some privacy,” the girl winks at Lucy. “Hint. Hint!”

“I-It’s too soon for that! W-with us,” her tips burn with lies through each syllable.

“Pfft, you can’t lie that you’ve never thought about it.”

“No... not all the way...”

“Uh-huh. Well, do whatever,” she winks a second time and stands up to leave. “See ya in tomorrow night.”

“Yeah. See ya.”

“Why are your ears all red?” Natsu asks Lucy.

Lucy stiffens up. “N-Nothing important.”

“Oh... okay,” he smiles. “So whatdya wanna do next?”

“Actually, I’m kinda getting tired already.” It was after 3 am and they’d been out and on their feet for over seven hours.

Natsu sighs relief. “Me too! I just didn’t wanna ruin your fun. Shall I take you home?” He squeezes her hand with a smile.

“Yes,” she returns the squeeze, “and if you’d like you can spend the night— I-I mean since you’re tired and all! I’d just feel better than making you back track.”

“I’ll behave, I promise.”

The couple ride the train the short distance between Shibuya and Shinjuku to where Lucy’s dorm is located, cautious of the other riders on the train. Even though alcohol is not allowed on the streets during Halloween, it didn’t stop people from getting drunk and few creepy peepers kept looking at Lucy. But luckily, the train wasn’t very packed despite the holiday because the Shibuya party wasn’t over till 4am and they beat the end rush. On the way, Natsu texts his roommate out of courtesy, only to find out that Gray and Juvia were already at the apartment. _Figures._ Well it was a good thing he wasn’t walking into that situation! Even if nothing happened, just watching Juvia fawning all over Gray wouldn’t have been appealing. Once they arrive at the dorms, they make sure no one had followed and proceed inside.

Lucy leaves Natsu in the small living room as she changes out of her costume and into something a lot more comfortable. He was lucky the men’s costume was still semi-normal and he only had to remove the jacket and goggles for comfort, but the black hair dye will wash out in a week. She then grabs them a couple bottles of melon milk tea before joining him on the couch. Thank goodness, they didn’t have school, or he didn’t work the next day.

“That was fun,” Lucy curls against his arm with a yawn. “So, tiring though.”

“I haven’t been to Shibuya’s party in a couple of years, but it sure hasn’t changed,” Natsu chuckles. He leans his head against hers while threading their fingers together. “Totally agree on being tired. It probably wouldn’t be as bad if I hadn’t worked too.”

A companionable silence falls over the couple for a few minutes and after some time Natsu assumed Lucy had fallen asleep resting on his shoulder. He would have stayed in that position till his ass was numb if it kept her relaxed. This beauty queen deserved it and more, and he meant every word he’d told her earlier. The second chance had become a cosmic wish come true and he’d be damned to let anything ruin this between them.

“Hey Natsu?”

“Yeah Luce?”

“Do you think we could pick up from where we left off... in that photo booth?”

He swallows hard. It was one thing in the heat of the moment, but quite another to put aside his nerves now that they were so relaxed. This was a different kind of intimacy and much more intimidating to say the least. A private apartment without anything or anyone to interrupt or stop two consenting adults from going too far... and the last thing he wanted to do was something wrong! A regretted decision would destroy everything built up until that moment. But he couldn’t tell her no either!

Sensing the turmoil, Lucy sits up and turns his face towards her. Her instincts were probably on point earlier about his anxiety. “We don’t have to, if you’re not ready, but I wouldn’t mind making out with you... just a little.” She adds in the goal as a way to allay his fears. And it works. Lucy immediately feels his shoulders relax again. She gently caresses his cheek, her eyes zeroing in on his lips. “I just… like kissing you Natsu.”

“I’ll let you direct then, a-and if I start going too far, just stop me. I won’t get mad, I just...”

“Shh, I know,” she smiles, “and that what I like about you.”

Lucy closes the gap and steals his lips, starting slow, then adding pressure behind it. Her hand slides behind his head, fingers weaving into his messy hair as she tilts her head to deepen the kiss. Their tongues tease and test, mouths molding together as teeth clack gently the further, they push each other’s oral boundaries. She could still taste some of the sweetness of the crapes lingering.

His own hands stay glued, one with fingers twined in her hair and the other to Lucy’s side, just below the rib cage. Natsu loses himself in her kisses, they were so soft and sweet, a little adventurous as she ran her tongue once over his canines and giggled. That brought a grin to his lips and a straight arrow through his heart. He wasn’t ready to say it out loud yet, but he loved Lucy. His heart knew it and that’s all that matters, so when the time is right, he’ll tell her, but not yet, he knew she wasn’t ready for that level.

Natsu’s so lost in the kisses he barely registers additional heat against his chest as Lucy’s hand has found its way under his shirt. It wasn’t doing more than simply resting against his pectorals, but it was much further than he’d expected her to venture tonight. Every few minutes her fingers would lightly curl against his skin or move slightly up or down, sending little shivers over his skin. As far as he was concerned, she could do anything she wanted to him as long as it was her choice.

It surprises him when Lucy starts to press forward. At first one of his hands moves to keep from falling back onto the couch, but her sudden whine triggers him to let it happen and the next thing he knows Lucy is using him as a bed. So, he wraps his left arm more firmly around her body to make sure she doesn’t fall off.

Lucy lifts her head to look Natsu in the eyes. “Is this okay?” She questions him. “Am I too heavy?”

“I don’t mind,” he smiles at her, “but are you comfortable? I could shift us over so we’re more on our sides.”

“That would be great. Just felt like snuggling more.”

He kisses her lips. “Works for me.” Natsu then adjusts their bodies carefully until Lucy’s back is resting against the couches backing with her head on his shoulder and chest. She wraps her arm around his torso and huddles close to his frame, while their legs are slightly tangled together. “Comfy?”

“Mmm hmm,” she nods her head against his chest and closes her eyes.

Natsu kisses the top of her head, bringing a smile to her face, then wraps his left arm over to rest his hand on her shoulder and cuddle her close. “Goodnight, Lucy.”

“Mmm. Goodnight, Natsu.”

Eight months ago, the only thing Natsu thought about was a career and now after that fateful train ride he knew his new goal in life had to include the blonde next to him. Lucy felt so perfect in his arms and oh, if only he could wake up like this every morning for the rest of his life, well than he’d be the luckiest man on the planet. With a smile of his own, he closes his eyes and lets the cadence of her heartbeat lull him to sleep. This was a very happy Halloween indeed!


	15. Chapter 15

It had become a pretty routine idea for the couple whenever a new and interesting movie hit the theaters to check it out. They could relax and cuddle, letting the stressors of school and work melt away onto the big screen where actors made them laugh or cry and laugh again. The theater that Saturday afternoon was busy with the line for the concession stand long but moving at a decent pace. Natsu and Lucy weren’t too worried about getting a good seat because they’d arrived early enough.

“Do you think Pets 2 will be as good as the first one?” Lucy questions Natsu.

“I don’t know. I mean the first one was okay I guess.” He pokes her side in a teasing manner. “You’re just excited cause Mamoru Miyano is dubbing a character again.”

“He’s hot, what can I say and if he was single, well...” she shrugs with a devious grin, “who knows.”

“Pfft, I’m a much better catch, plus he’s old.”

“I’m just teasing,” Lucy giggles. “But he is not that old!”

Natsu is still laughing over the protective behavior she shows for her favorite voice actor, just as they finally reach the front of the concession stand. “Should I just grab a big tub of popcorn and we share?” He double checks with her.

“No way mister,” she laughs, “I want a small one for myself cause last time I barely got any.”

“Okay that’s true, what about a drink? Share or no?”

“Hmm, yeah, that’s fine. Ooh, and don’t forget my _arare_ this time.”

It takes only a few minutes for the worker to put their order together. Natsu grabs the two containers of popcorn and their candies, while Lucy holds the carrier with the drinks. They then head towards the hallways leading to the theater rooms. It was a pretty big lobby area with three hallway branches to choose from, so they check to make sure they take the correct one. But just as they’re about to turn in that direction, something or someone bumps so hard into Natsu’s back that he stumbles and the food he was holding flies forward all over the ground. Lucy who was walking right beside him is also hit, though managed to keep the drinks from being thrown too.

“What the fuck?!” He yells from the impact and Lucy cries out too.

The whole event was seconds in the making, like a blur of food flying, gasps around them, and immediate questions needing answers. Natsu moves to spin around to confront the person, when arms are quickly wrapping themselves around his body. Meanwhile, Lucy is sent into an emotional tailspin from the sight. Anger and frustration topping the list.

“Touka?!” Lucy screams.

“Touka?!” Natsu parrots his girlfriend since he can’t see behind him. He claws at the arms around him. “Get the fuck off me you crazy bitch!”

A crowd of gawkers gathers to see what was going on, and employees from the concession stand get on phones to call for security.

“Natsu! I can’t believe you’re cheating on me!” The woman retorts and digs in, holding on as tight as possible. “I’m your girlfriend not her!”

“You are not my girlfriend!” He screams as he tries desperately to untangle her arms from his body. “Let me you go you crazy nut case!”

“Touka, let Natsu go!” Lucy shrieks too, digging her nails into the woman’s arm. She didn’t care if she drew blood at this point because she’d had enough of Toukas antics. For months and months, the woman has harassed them. Always showing up and spying on them, approaching them with this same rhetoric. But it was the first time she’d become this physical, latching onto Natsu and not letting go. “Touka, you’re crazy! Leave us alone!”

“He’s mine!” The woman screams back. “Natsu’s mine and you stole him from me!”

“She didn’t steal nothin’ you demented freak!” Natsu finally pulls her locked arms away and flips her over his shoulder. Touka lands hard on her back to the gasps and murmurs of onlookers, but Natsu didn’t care at this point. He was too fed up with the stalker behaviors that’s been driven him crazy for almost three years now! “I can’t take it anymore! I’m pressing charges Touka since you won’t leave us alone!”

Sobbing on the floor but undeterred, Touka grabs for his ankle. “No! I’ll never give you up! Never!”

Natsu kicks her hand away, then grabs Lucy by the waist and pulls them both out of reach from the crazed blonde. “Stay away from me and Lucy, Touka! I mean it! This has gone too far!”

Lucy immediately turns and buries her face in his chest as he holds her close. Her mind was reeling and on the verge of tears. Why couldn’t she leave them alone! It had been frustrating until now, but this was getting scary. It felt like they didn’t have the freedom to be in public together without constantly worrying if Touka would show up. Usually, if there were people around, she was less likely to, so her actions this time showed an escalation in behavior.

In that moment, security arrived and takes charge of the situation. Two of the men secured Touka and haul her away to the building’s security office, while another questions the couple along with witnesses in the lobby. The pair tells them what happened and Natsu insists on pressing assault charges on Touka. Once witnesses confirm their story, the guards take all of the contact information and allow them to leave. Theater employees offer to replace their food for free, but Lucy is so shaken that she just wants to get out of there. It was nice of the staff to give them free vouchers for their next trip.

“I’m so sorry I ever doubted you, Natsu.” Lucy clung to his side as they walked the short distance to his apartment. “There’s something seriously wrong with that girl.”

“Shh,” he kisses her temple, “it’s okay. You were just protecting yourself. But I promise you, we’ll get through this.”

“Are you really gonna push the charges?”

“Hell yes, I should have done it long ago. Maybe then she would have taken it more seriously.”

“I hope so too. Maybe they’ll give her counseling in jail.”

When they arrive at Natsu’s apartment, Gray was home but napping in his room, so they set up in the living room. Lucy makes them drinks and microwave popcorn, then they put on a movie. It wasn’t the same as a theater experience, but at least it was cozy. She cuddles up on his lap with the bowl of popcorn on hers, trying to focus on the movie rather than the events of that day. He in turn keeps his arms around her body to hold her close.

Stuff like this was exactly what she feared in deciding to date Natsu, but she never thought it would go this far. She was too deeply attached to him to give up now and aside from dealing with Touka, he was everything he’d promised he would be, which was such a rarity that couldn’t be given up lightly. Lucy was comfortable with him, as if they’d known each other forever. Natsu was sweet, caring, affectionate, smart, handsome, funny, respectful of her no matter what. She could tell it pained him whenever stuff like this occurred, frustrated as if he was failing somehow. But it wasn’t all his fault. While yes, he could have been blunter with the woman in the beginning, Lucy had to admit that his caring nature was one of the reasons she loved him for. She couldn’t very well fault him for it now. Natsu also couldn’t control the fact Touka was just crazier than normal.

“You’re thinking about things, I can tell cause your brows are furrowing.” Natsu’s voice is soft as he speaks. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

Lucy shakes her head. “No. I’ll be okay, I promise. It’s just so hard to rap my brain around how some people can behave like that.”

“It would kill me, but I’d understand if you’re tired of having to deal with all this... or me.”

She turns slightly in his lap. “I’m not leaving. I’m— scared, but I’m not gonna let her win either. You’re just too good to give up.”

Natsu’s face softens further, slightly embarrassed at such an affirmation. He cradles her cheeks and kisses her lips gently. “It’s me who’s the lucky one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for your patience. This week was pretty crazy distracting with the elections lol
> 
> *Note: arare= shoyu flavored rice crackers. It's makes a really good snack, but if you add it to popcorn with some furikake omg so oishi, delicious!
> 
> For those that don't know who he is, Mamoru Miyano is a popular voice actor in Japan for both anime and he's done dub work for American movies like Pets/Pets 2, etc. He's also my favorite Japanese singer :) I love him so much, OMG. 
> 
> Last note, the story does take a majorly angsty turn at this point. I swear this ends happier if you can handle the drama lol.


	16. Chapter 16

As she walked from the train station to her apartment, Lucy didn’t know if it was just her nerves getting the best of her or a real danger right around the corner. Those creepy feelings that send tingling sensations along your spine or the hairs on the back of your neck standing to attention was a constant reminder that she was the lead actress in a horror movie. Every time Lucy was alone in public, her senses went on alert like prey being stalked by a predator, and she had every right to be cautious with Touka still loose on the streets.

Touka’s arrest after the movie theater incident did nothing to deter the woman from making the couple’s lives miserable. In fact, it only escalated her determination to win Natsu and get Lucy out of her way. For three month’s she’s stalked them through social media. They would block her, and she’d simply open a new account. They made their pages private, but she’d find ways to send messages. Lucy was starting to wonder if the woman was hacking into their pages.

_‘You can’t get away from me Natsu...’_

_‘I won’t let you have him you bitch!’_

_‘The authorities can’t stop me...’_

_‘I love you more than she ever will! Please Natsu! How could you be so cruel?!’_

_‘Watch your back you whore!’_

_‘I’ll do anything you want Natsu! I worship you! Please! I’ll be the perfect woman just for you!’_

Lucy bore the brunt of the harassment, being called every derogatory name under the sun, while Natsu’s were a mix of anger and pleadings to be her boyfriend. Touka was coming unhinged and desperate people could lead to desperate decisions. A woman who started off seemingly so sweet and nice had turned into a demon. Frankly, it baffled Lucy how anyone could present two opposing faces so easily, but obsession was a strong motivator. Counselors at school told them that for stalkers it’s all about control and once them feel they’ve lost it, that’s when they start to lash out. _‘Well, duh,’_ Lucy rolled her eyes at that one. Tell them something they hadn’t figured out on their own.

Sometimes they thought they caught glimpses of Touka while out around town, watching them from around street corners or shop windows, blend into cafes or around shelves in stores. It was hard to confirm because when they did a double-take, the woman would disappear. The woman was also legally trespassed by Natsu’s workplace, Lucy’s school dorm, the movie theater, and the bar Cana works at. Plus, the theater attack got them restraining orders against Touka, which meant she couldn’t come within 100 yards of the couple. So far, her harassment consisted of internet messages and she’d abided by the distance order, but really, what would a piece of paper do if Touka chose to finally ignore it?

 _“You okay?”_ Natsu questions his girlfriend, _“you went silent.”_

“Oh, sorry, y-yeah I’m okay, just drifting into thoughts again.”

They were lucky to have a great support system. All of their friends pitched in to take turns, making sure Lucy was rarely ever alone in public. Someone would walk her to and from school. If she needed to go out, one of them would volunteer whenever Natsu couldn’t. She stayed in areas that had a lot of people, so she’d be less likely to be approached. But when no one was available, he would stay on the phone with her like now. Lucy appreciated it all, because at least she had a voice to comfort her.

_“Oh, alright. How much longer till you get to the dorms?”_

“Maybe 15 minutes.”

But the messages that sent the worst chills through Lucy, were the ones detailing what she was doing or where she was at when the messages were sent. It was confirmation that Touka was truly stalking every move they made, and the couple couldn’t go out in public without the fear of being confronted again. The authorities weren’t any help either and unfortunately her messages through social media were not considered a violation under current anti-stalker laws. Harassment was also difficult to prove because the woman never used her real name which left open the possibility it was some other person harassing them.

According to Levy’s boyfriend Gajeel, the police’s hands were tied unless Touka slipped up and made a direct threat to harm them. But so far, the woman had been cunning enough to stay anonymous. This was exactly why current laws did nothing to curb people from engaging in such behaviors. The counselor warned them that the only way to stop a stalker is intensive psychological treatment. But to get to that point required voluntary treatment or a court order, hence the couple’s frustrations with the system.

 _“Whatcha, thinking about?”_ Natsu breaks the silence again.

“Just the stuff Gajeel was explaining,” she sighs back. “It’s all so stupid, like they don’t even care.” Aside from Levy’s boyfriend, Lucy got the distinct impression that the cops didn’t take stalking very seriously.

 _“I’m so sorry this is happening Lucy. We both graduate in just six more months, maybe we could move to the other side of Japan?”_ She could hear it in Natsu’s voice how useless he felt under these circumstances.

“Or another country,” she mumbled back. At this point she wanted to get as far away as possible. They’d done everything they could think of, notifying their schools and the security at their homes of the potential threat. But as long as Touka was free to run the streets, short of packing up and moving far away which was out of the question because of school, there wasn’t anything else they could do except stay vigilant.

_“If that’s what would make you happy Lucy, I’ll find a way to make it happen. I got a cousin that lives in the US, maybe he can get us jobs.”_

Lucy thinks for a moment, “I don’t think you’ve mentioned this cousin before, what’s he doing there?”

 _“Sting went for college then ended up staying after graduation cause he met a guy. I think they’ve been together now for 5 years, so it must be working out,”_ Natsu chuckles.

His comment pulls a giggle from Lucy, “I wouldn’t mind trying out the US. We could think of it as an adventure before settling down.”

_“Settling... down? As in, getting married?”_

“W-What?! N-No, I mean, maybe, I mean it’s possible...” She hears the laughter on the other end and that stops her rambling.

 _“Hey, I was just clarifying,”_ Natsu’s chuckles soften. _“I agree, whatever happens, it would definitely be a fun adventure.”_

Her cheeks flushed by the new images floating through her mind and a silly smile now screwed onto her face. Lucy was certain that between them, they could do well, find jobs, and lead a comfortable life wherever they chose to go. Maybe a change of scenery would do them well. Certainly, her stress level would thank her for it.

“Do you really think… that would work? That we could pull it off because...” Lucy’s voice cuts off abruptly mid-sentence, followed by the sounds of a scuffle, like the phone being jiggled around.

 _“Lucy?!”_ He called out with no reply. _“Lucy?! Answer me!”_

A sudden scream from Lucy’s end, runs his blood cold, and he hears a familiar voice just before the line cuts off permanently. It was muffled, but clearly— “Touka?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of info on stalking in Japan: 
> 
> https://www.nippon.com/en/people/bg900061/uchizawa-junko-confessions-of-a-japanese-stalking-victim.html
> 
> They now recognize social media messages and such as evidence in these case, but that wasn't until 2018 and stalking is till an issue in this society as well as other Asian countries like South Korea, especially against women because the misogynistic cultural views.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the wait, here is the latest chapter :)

The inhuman roar that came out of Natsu the moment the call cut off sent a chill through everyone present in the store. Customers quietly move to a different aisle, and even Ezra, who is as tough as they come, takes a step back from her friend. Always such a lovable goof ball, they’d never seen this level of anger from him before.

“That bitch Touka! I think she just kidnapped Lucy!”

“Wait? What?!” Erza snaps to attention. “How do you know?”

“Lucy just stopped... then I heard the voice— I-I gotta go, I gotta... fuck!” He roars again. “That bitch is gonna pay!”

Erza walks up and puts her hands on his shoulders, staring with a calm yet determined look. “Just go, Natsu. If you think she’s in trouble, go. I’ll finish closing up here. And let us know if you need anything from us.”

“Y-yeah...” he fumbles at his pockets, checking for his keys and belongings. “Thanks, Erza.”

Once Natsu ascertains he has everything, he runs out the door, calling Levy as he hails a passing taxi. The girl answers by the second ring.

“Oh, hey Nat—.”

“Levy, did Lucy make it home?!”

“Whoa, slow down. No, she didn’t. What’s going on? Why are you shouting?”

“It’s Touka! Lucy and I, w-we were talking, and she just cut off, and I heard that bitch’s voice! I think she took her! I think she took Lucy!”

“Oh, my god! Okay— okay, um, lemme call Gajeel. Are you coming here? Do you know where Touka lives?”

Tears are threatening to spill at this point from the frustration and sheer panic he was experiencing. “No! I don’t know where she lives!”

“Okay, okay, d-don’t panic Natsu, we’ll find her. Just get here as soon as you can, and we’ll go from there.”

He has no idea how Levy is staying so calm considering this is her best friend who’s missing, but also relieved that one of them could still think rationally. “O-Okay.”

The entire cab ride over, which took less than 15 minutes, was probably the longest journey ever for the young man. Every outcome and possibility runs through his mind, but when it came to the worst scenarios, he just can’t go there... he didn’t want to believe that Touka would go so far, prays that the woman would somehow realize how wrong she was— yet his heart just _knew_ , and such a sinking devastation threatens to tear him to pieces. Guilt replaces anger that this was all his fault. He could’ve avoided all of it by giving Touka what she wanted even though that meant living a miserable life of his own, but at least Lucy would be safe and not in the clutches of a mad woman.

The poor cab driver tries to take Natsu to the hospital in concern for the young man’s mental state, but he simply grit his teeth and directs the driver to Lucy’s dorm. It took all of his willpower not to scream since it wasn’t the cabbies fault. He wouldn’t understand... kidnappings in Japan aren’t exactly commonplace, and besides, Natsu didn’t want to set off Touka by contacting the authorities outright. Gajeel he trusted because of Levy, but the rest of the force never gave the couple a sense of caring, so why would he trust them?

As he arrives, he finds Levy already downstairs waiting to usher him upstairs to the apartment. The clock is ticking, and time is of the essence.

“Oh, Natsu!” Levy hugs tightly to the man as he practically collapses in her arms. “Don’t panic just yet, you know Lucy is tougher than she looks, and smart. We’ll find her in time.”

But his heart is simply too heavy with burden. “I should have listened,” he sobs into her shoulder. “I should have realized just how dangerous Touka is, but I was selfish and didn’t wanna give Lucy up...”

“Shhh, shhh, Natsu this is not your fault. Lucy knew the danger too and she still chose you.” Levy pushes his head up and smashes his face between her palms. “Natsu look at me. This is not your fault. Touka is sick, you have nothing to do with that. Now get it together! You can fall apart after we get Lucy back safely!”

Natsu’s eyes flare wide at the sudden outburst, but she’s right. “Sorry...” he stands up straight and wipes the tears off his face. “You’re right. I need to be strong for her.”

“Good.” She nods and takes him to the apartment, filling him in along the way. “Gajeel is running the address they have on file for her right now.”

“I forgot about that. The cops must have her in the system from the arrest.”

Inside the apartment, they sit down on the couch and wait for Gajeel to call back. Levy makes Natsu some tea to try and calm his nerves, but nothing is working. How could it? His girlfriend was out there somewhere with a woman who’s shown no evidence of stopping, just an escalation of behaviors. He hangs his and closes his eyes, praying to gods he’s never prayed to before to please, don’t let anything happen to Lucy. Take him instead, but not her. Why couldn’t Touka have come after him instead? His mind is so fuzzy like the static noise from an old television set. The white noise of too much information and emotions mixing, drowning out any logic and rational thought.

The sound of Levy’s phone ringing causes him to flinch. He turns his head as she answers, listening to her side of the conversation.

“Oh, okay. Are you sure? So, it’s wrong? Parent’s address... do you think they’ll talk? What about employer? True, morning... we can’t wait till morning! No... I know...”

By the time Levy said, _‘parent’s address,’_ Natsu knew they’ve hit a dead end. His heart sinks, and all the focus he’d redirected towards hope is dashed like a boat against a rocky shore. Tokyo is just too big of a city to search without a starting point and they knew nothing about Touka to give them one. He pulls out his phone and starts scrolling through the woman’s Instagram photos, looking for any clues to her whereabouts. There were tons of pictures on her blog, mostly of her in public spaces— that look suspiciously like places he and Lucy frequents. “Ugh!” All this time he should’ve been keeping an eye on her blog! His anger returns with a vengeance the longer he scrolls. To anyone else, these photos look non-descript, but for him it’s plain as day, evidence of the woman stalking them! The bitch was chronicling her movements in plain view! “Stupid!” Natsu growls at himself. Wait a minute, he zeroes into the latest upload. “Fucking bitch!”

“What, what?!” Levy pauses the conversation with her boyfriend to question the outburst.

“Look at this!” He shows her the photo. It was a long distance shot of Lucy walking from behind, and he can see that the surrounding area is the same route she takes to her dorm. “It was posted tonight, right before my call to Lucy was cut off!”

“Oh my god...” Levy breathes out in utter disbelief. “She really is insane.”

And if that isn’t bad enough, the tagline left no doubt as to what Touka is planning. The phone slips from Natsu’s hand as all the blood drains from his face.

_‘If I can’t have you, neither will she...’_


	18. Chapter 18

When Lucy finally comes to, her head ached, and the room spun. It took her several minutes to gain her bearings and register the last thing she could remember. Touka had attacked from behind and held a sweet-smelling rag over her mouth as she fought to get away. How long had it taken? If her memory was accurate, several minutes had passed by as her consciousness faded to black. Whatever the substance was, knocked her out cold and now she had no idea where she was.

Lucy slowly peeked open one eye cautiously, knowing Touka could be watching her at that very moment. The layout in her limited vision resembled a small, non-descript living room, perhaps an apartment with a couch and window right above it. The light outside signified it was still nighttime, but unfortunately there were no clocks within her sight line. Lucy herself was lying on her side on the floor, hands and feet bound, with her backpack tossed a few feet away. She could hear movement coming from somewhere around and behind her as if someone, assumedly Touka, was rummaging through a drawer. Lucy dared not move a muscle and give away the fact she’d woken up, but she knew she needed to assess her situation as best she could, looking for a way to escape if the opportunity presented itself.

But before she could do that, her eyes focused in on the wall opposite the couch... covered, literally _covered_ with photos of Natsu. In her limited extent, Lucy could see herself in some and spied friends of theirs scattered through others, all likely taken as the woman stalked him through the years. She zeroed in on something odd. A few of the photos looked much older than the rest and pictured Natsu in a high school uniform. Had Touka known him, stalked him for longer than he’d realized, or had she stolen them from his social media? And who was the blonde girl in a couple of the photos? Another stalked victim like Lucy and Lisanna? This young girl was a little heavy set, with a short, bobbed type hairstyle and wore thick framed eyeglasses. She was also in a high school uniform, and in both photos in close proximity to Natsu.

If Touka really had been obsessed since high school, it may explain why her behaviors escalated so quickly. Imagine pining for years and years only to watch the man you love in the arms of other women, eventually a person might go crazy. But it still didn’t excuse Touka’s behavior. Lucy’s had her share of crappy relationships or guys she crushed on who weren’t interested. It was a part of life and life wasn’t always fair. You move on. You certainly don’t kidnap your rival!

Footstep patterns changed behind her, so Lucy closed her eyes quickly, listening to its movements. She could hear it coming closer, almost felt the other persons energy above her. Was Touka checking on her? Her breathing grew shallow in anticipation. What did this woman have planned for her?

“Oi! Wakey, wakey! You’ve been out for long enough!”

It takes Lucy by surprise, when a hard kick lands square in her back. She cries out once, just as a second hit to her stomach doubled her over in pain. Her arms instinctively tried to cover the area from another blow, but it was made difficult by the fact her hands were bound tightly in front of her. So, Lucy curls her body into a fetal position, fighting an urge to scream out in pain and give the woman any satisfaction.

“Get up you bitch!” Touka uses her foot to try and push Lucy onto her back, but Lucy fights to stay curled up. So, she kicks Lucy again in the back, but lower near her kidneys, causing her to scream and unfurl in excruciating pain. “That’s right you slut. Feel the pain you put me through because it ends tonight!”

“Leave me alone!” Lucy screamed back as she scrambled to a sitting position. “Hurting me won’t make Natsu love you!”

“Pfft, I’ve figured that out. But now I don’t care, because I’ve decided if I can’t be his girlfriend,” her eyes narrow in on Lucy, “then neither will you. You’ll be dead and Natsu will learn what it’s like to lose someone they love forever.” Touka shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. “It’s as simple as that.”

The level of malice dripping from Touka’s words sent Lucy’s heart sinking with the realization this woman had truly gone over the edge. She was calm like a deranged psychopath who talked as if murder was as easy as going out for a cup of coffee. As much as she wanted to panic, she knew she needed to stay focused. _‘Think, Lucy think! I need to buy some time,’_ because surely Natsu and her friends were already looking for her.

“But if you do this, you know your life will be ruined, you’ll go to jail, do you really wanna go to jail? There must be someone that you care about and loves you too... parents, siblings, friends who wouldn’t want you to throw your life away for some guy.”

“Not everyone has had a perfect little life like you. Yeah, I know enough, rich daddy, sure your mom died when you were a kid, but you’re smart and beautiful, that’s why guys like Natsu fall head over heels for girls like you while the rest of us are left in the gutter. I watch you around school and _every—one_ just loves you.”

“What are you talking about? From the first time I met you I thought you’re a pretty girl and very intelligent. And you’re wrong, when I thought guys liked me it always ended up because of money or my body, they never cared if I was smart. I was just a piece of eye candy they could strap to their arm and parade around. Pretty girls never know if we’re loved for who we are.”

“Pfft, well even so, I still rather have had some guys give me a chance, but they never did. I wasn’t always like this you know. LASIK surgery allowed me to ditch the glasses, changed my hair, and plastic surgery to fix my body. It took me years and a lot of money to look like this! But it was too late. Nothing I did would get Natsu’s attention, _nothing_! And just when I thought I’d gotten into his circle _you_ showed up and ruined everything!”

“Touka, there are lots of great guys out there who’ll love the new you. Why not embrace it and move on?”

“Because I don’t want to! I’ve loved Natsu since high school, and that’s not something you can just throw away.”

Lucy’s eyes widened, the photos! Her head turned to the wall, “that’s you, isn’t it, in the photos,” she lifted her hands and pointed.

“Yeah, that’s me bitch, and as you’re no doubt figuring out, Natsu doesn’t even realize who I am. Back then I was too shy, the class geek, the chubby weird girl who sat alone at lunch, and picked last in gym class while he was in the popular group. Him and Gray, and all their other buddies. All I could do was cry myself to sleep night after night, praying that one day I’ll get my chance.” Touka takes a step forward towards Lucy. “And that chance is now!”

“Y-You won’t get away with this Touka, please think about your future!” Lucy puts her bound hands up, trying to shuffle backwards but the binding on her ankles are making it almost impossible. “Killing me will only make your life worse, you don’t really want that. H-How about we start over, we can be friends, I’ll introduce you to even better guys than Natsu, r-rich guys who’ll buy you whatever you want!”

Touka grabs Lucy by the wrists and yanks her forward, spinning her around. “Stupid slut, I don’t care about money.” She put her arm around Lucy’s throat in an attempted choke lock and whispered right next to her ear. “What I want… is revenge.” 


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience! Whew! The last couple weeks were rough with final projects and exams. Fall is all over now, hooray!! One month break until Spring starts up so I hope to get all caught up on any projects I have.

“FUCK!!!” Natsu screams and buries his face in his hands. The message was loud and clear and if they didn’t find Lucy quickly, Touka was set to kill.

Levy rushed over to console the man because she knew the situation had just turned into a worst-case scenario. “D-Don’t lose hope yet,” she does her best to keep her voice smooth even though inside she was screaming. “We’ll find her, Gajeel can track… her phone... wait a minute,” She suddenly jumps up and rushes back to her phone. “Track her phone! I can track her phone!”

Natsu looks up, “what are you taking about?!”

“A couple years ago I lost my old phone,” Levy rambled as she tapped furiously on her screen, “so, after I replaced it, we both turned on a tracker app so we could find each other’s phones in case it happened again! I never imagined it would come in so handy!”

“Are you serious!” He jumped off the couch and rushed over to the woman with hopeful intent.

Once it began, they watched the cursor on the screen pulsing as it searched for Lucy’s phone signal. Each second that ticked by was excruciatingly slow. “Come on, come on,” they chant together. The map on the screen starts to move, zeroing in, closer and closer.

“Looks like...” Levy mumbled aloud as it moved, “somewhere in Meguro... near a Meguro nursery school...”

“I know that area...”

“What?”

“That’s my hometown.”

“Okay it’s stopped moving, that must be the building.” Levy quickly screen shots the location and forwards it to Natsu’s phone. “I’ll send it to Gajeel too. If you hurry you might be able to catch a train to the closest station.”

“Thanks, Levy!” Natsu wasted no time in rushing out the door. Precious minutes were already passing by and it’ll take him at least 30 minutes by train. He called Gray to update him on the situation as he ran to the station.

“Yeah, that’s near our old high school man, I don’t get it,” Natsu tells his friend.

 _“Maybe it’s a coincidence?”_ Gray responds.

“I don’t know. That chicks been stalking me for a couple years that I know of, but something is just not settling right for me.”

_“You think she knew you in high school?”_

“Maybe... oh, I’m getting on the train now. I’ll call you as soon as I can.”

_“Good luck Natsu and be careful!”_

“I will.”

Natsu plopped down onto a seat out of breath from running as fast as he could. It was lucky for him that the train hit the station he was near in a few minutes. Maybe luck was finally on his side. According to Gajeel, the address the police had on file went back to a location in the city of Yokohama which was close by to Meguro. It was Touka’s parents home that she’d given, but according to them, the girl had left as soon as she was 18 and never contacted them again. Obviously, she’d given the address to lead them away from her current location. There were more questions than answers at this point and frustrating to everyone involved.

Was it possible that Touka had attended Meguro Nihon University high school along with he and Gray? Is that why she still lived so close to it? It wasn’t uncommon for students to attend high schools away from home if the curriculum offered was what the student was interested in. That’s why he’d chosen the school, but luckily it was still in his hometown. But no matter how much he tried, Natsu couldn’t remember ever seeing a girl that looked like Touka. She may look different now, but could it really be so drastic that he wouldn’t remember her? Then again, he hadn’t paid much attention to the opposite sex back then so it’s highly possible he’d missed her.

He received a call from Levy letting him know that after further digging, Gajeel was able to narrow down the apartment number and building address, confirming what the tracking site already told them. The phone number they had on file for Touka was also turned off, so they couldn’t reach her, but did confirm the Instagram post along with the previous incident will be used as probable cause to search the woman’s apartment. The wheels of justice were slow, but at least it was finally moving. If only they’d taken the couples concerns more seriously, Touka may not have had an opportunity to kidnap Lucy. Gajeel is pushing his supervisors to move quickly under the circumstances, but in order to make sure the charges stick, everything needed to be done by the book. The warrant was being signed as they spoke and Natsu was warned to be careful. If he located the right place, to not go in unless he felt Lucy’s life was in imminent peril, because no one knew what Touka was capable of.

No average citizen could plan for situations like, and Natsu certainly had no experience to help him figure out what to do or not to do. Should he wait for the police to arrive? Should he just barge in? What if he does and it only makes things worse? If Touka was in love with him, would she attack him too? It was certainly a possibility. Nobody can fully understand what a person is willing to do when their mind is crazed, and such uncertainties are the most dangerous of situations.

It felt so uncomfortable being back on his home turf under these circumstances. Definitely not the homecoming he’d wish upon anyone. There were six blocks from the station to the apartment building, so in order to get there quicker Natsu hailed a taxi. As he stared out the window, eyes narrowed, calculating, seeing all the familiar landmarks, again his anger built up. How dare Touka stain his memories of Meguro like this! A convenience store they’d shop at, the nursery school his little sister attended, or the high school he loved so much... He’ll never be able to come home again without remembering this is also where Lucy had been kidnapped and brought to.

The streets were empty, silent and still if not for the occasional car passing through. Amber streetlights illuminated the way. Natsu has the taxi drop him off around the corner from the apartment building, just in case Touka was watching for them. The woman had to assume that her actions would bring consequences. As he gets closer, Natsu assesses the three-story building. It was nondescript and open with no visible security gates or guards, just a single stairwell leading to the upper floors. According to Gajeel, Touka’s apartment was number 206 on the second floor. So, he slips cautiously along the building’s exterior to hide his presence as best as he could and ascends the staircase, soft steps to negate any sounds from his shoes. Number 206 was the last apartment on the second floor which meant he had to pass by five others. These poor people had no idea what was going on right beside them.

Natsu gently leans up to Touka’s front door, pressing his ear against the solid wood to listen for any evidence that Lucy was indeed inside. He could hear light sobbing between a low and somewhat muffled conversation. Ugh! He couldn’t tell who the voices were coming from! No— wait... okay it is Lucy inside! Natsu quickly typed out a text to Levy confirming the woman was alive and the address was on point, to which Levy responded with Gajeel was on the way with a warrant.

But the longer Natsu listened, the louder the voices inside were becoming, angrier and growing desperate...

_“No! Please don’t kill me!!!”_

His eyes widen instantaneously like a shot of instant adrenaline. That was Lucy! And the panic her voice screamed immediate. Without a moment of hesitation or thought, Natsu grabbed the door handle. Fuck! It was locked! He takes a step back and front-kicked the door as hard as he could, once, twice in quick succession around the locks. After the second hit, the door starts to give way, so he hauled back and gave it a third, then a shoulder. He didn’t care if he broke a bone or dislocated his shoulder because all he could think about was getting in there right now! With a final roar, Natsu slammed his body into the door. Wood goes flying as the frame gives way and the door swings open, the momentum causing him to stumble forward onto his knees.

“Nat—.”

Lucy’s scream is cut short and as Natsu looked up, he sees Touka standing behind Lucy with one arm around her body and a knife being held to her throat. Lucy’s hands and ankles were bound in front of her, shaking and fists clenching in a panicked agitation. All the blood drained from his face. One wrong move and Lucy was dead.

“T-Touka...” Natsu scrambled to his feet and put his hands up. “Just stay calm. D-Don’t do anything you’ll regret.”


	20. Chapter 20

Natsu put up his hands to show he was unarmed and not a threat. “Killing Lucy won’t make things better!”

“It will for me!” Touka raised the knife tightly against Lucy’s throat causing the woman to stiffen and tilt her head higher to avoid it. She leaned her head against Lucy’s, still smiling with a crazy twinkle in her eye. “I plan to kill her and me, then you’ll get to live the rest of your life in regret, forever wondering what you could have done to stop all of this... because you could have prevented a—ll of this!”

“Please, Touka, I-I’ll do whatever you want! I-I’ll break up with her, I’ll be your boyfriend, just let her go!”

“No,” Touka stated matter of fact with a small shake of her head. “Because it’ll still be all a lie and at the first opportunity, you’ll leave me again and run back to her. As long as this bitch is alive, she’ll al—ways be a threat. And I can’t let a threat live. Now get on your knees Natsu!”

“Touka, please—”

Furious that Natsu wasn’t listening, Touka started to lose her composure. Her hand tightened on the knife and shook in her anger. “DON’T PLAY WITH ME! GET ON YOUR FUCKING KNEES!!”

Lucy cried out as the knife dug into her skin and Natsu could see a bead of red drip down. It was only a drop, but his eyes flash wide that this crazy woman really had just cut his girlfriend with the knife! If he’d had any hopes of defusing the situation, it trailed away with that drop of blood along Lucy’s pale white skin. “Okay, okay!” He waved his hands frantically in defeat as he gets down. “I’m kneeling s-so don’t do anything rash yet.”

“You know Natsu, I bet you don’t even know who I really am, do you? You just think I’m some crazy psycho who’s been harassing you for a couple years, because you don’t remember me. Not you, not Gray, or any of your high school buddies remember who the fuck I am!”

“Touka,” he does his best to control the tremor in his voice. “I’m sorry, but I really don’t remember you.” The woman kept going from sixty back to zero on the gas pedal and vice versa, truly showing her unstable nature. It was making it difficult for Natsu to figure out his next steps.

“I’m not surprised.” She glared back. “Why would you, because I wasn’t pretty enough in high school to be noticed. I know, I know that all too well how guys like you only notice the pretty girls, not the nerdy, mousy ones, though I will admit, apparently none of the girls at Meguro Nihon seemed to meet your standards. I watched you carefully all three years and you never had a girlfriend. For a while, I even wondered if you swung for the same team, but no, I realized we just weren’t good enough for you. So, I told myself as soon as I could get away from my parents, I’ll remake myself into someone you will notice. Lost the weight, dyed my hair, changed how I dressed, and stalked your social media to learn as much as I could to figure out what you like, but nothing seemed to work.”

She removed the knife briefly from Lucy’s throat and tapped it on her chin in thought, before placing right back against the woman’s throat. “And I just don’t understand why. I’m intelligent, I’m pretty now, what the fuck more did I need to do?! Didn’t I show you just how much I worshiped the ground you walk on?! How I’d do anything, _anything_ , to make you happy?! And just when I thought I was making progress this bitch entered the picture.” Touka pressed hard again on the knife, eliciting a squeak from the woman and fresh tears to trickle down her face. “What does Lucy have that I don’t?! It’s the boobs, isn’t it? Because I don’t have as big a chest, I’m not as desirable?”

“T-That has nothing to do with it...” Natsu stammered out.

“Then what?! Natsu, what is it?! What does she have that I don’t have?! Tell me?!”

Lucy’s hands are bound in front of her and Natsu could see her hands clenching and unclenching desperately as if communicating something he wasn’t sure of. Because how should he answer such a question without making Touka even more angry? The truth or a lie, how would he know what will or won’t set the woman off? Obviously, Natsu couldn’t say it might have something to do with the incessant interjections, the clingy and pushy behaviors, or the stalking, or that it was some random spark between Lucy and he on that train that he couldn’t explain. He prayed silently for some kind of miracle, of an answer to set them free.

After several seconds of silence passed by, Touka screamed in frustration. “Fucking say something?! What makes this bitch so special?!”

“I-I don’t know!” Tears streamed down his face unable to figure out what else to do or say. “Okay?! I don’t know how to answer that! Lucy just caught my attention, maybe it was her personality, maybe it’s cause she’s in college, I really can’t answer why anyone ends up falling in love.”

Touka goes silent at his words for several tense seconds. Her brows furrowed in deep contemplation. “So... you love her?”

The tone in Touka’s voice causes Natsu’s blood to run ice cold. He knew in that instant, he’d fucked up. “Touka, please,” he begged. “Don’t do this. She doesn’t deserve this. You deserve someone who’ll love you too, but you won’t find that if you go to jail.”

“Do you think I’m stupid? I’m already heading to jail,” she responded with cold malice. “I kidnapped a woman, that alone gets me jail time. So, I have nothing to lose. The only thing I have to gain at this point is the satisfaction of watching you suffer, knowing you’ll suffer for the rest of your life for the pain you’ve wrought on two women. How ironic, isn’t it? Spent your younger years not paying attention to anyone, and when you _finally_ find someone, you end up hurting them in the worst way imaginable.” Touka grinned. “Life is _such_ a cruel joke.”

She pressed her head flush to Lucy’s temple, pushing hard enough that it forced the woman to tilt her head to the side. “I did try to warn you hun.” Touka placed a chaste kiss on Lucy’s cheek. “Should’a stayed away from Natsu like I told you to, but oh— no, you just didn’t wanna give him up. He says he loves you, Lucy. Do you love him too?”

Lucy doesn’t respond immediately to Touka’s question for fear of saying the wrong thing, but it actually makes the woman laugh. “Pfft, don’t tell me you got yourself in this mess when you don’t even love the guy yet!”

“Don’t answer her…” Natsu whispered but is cut off before he can say more.

“No, Lucy, _do_ answer me. I’m sure before you die, Natsu would like to know if he’s going through all of this for the right girl.”

“I-I…”

“Yes?” Touka purred, “tell us, Lucy.”

Tears flowed down Natsu’s cheeks. He knew based on the look on Lucy’s face what her answer was, and it would definitely set Touka off. “Please, don’t say it…” He begged.

“I’m sorry,” Lucy apologized as her eyes softened, communicating more than just the words to Natsu. “If I’m about to die, I might as well tell the truth.” Her voice is barely audible, but it was enough. “Yes. I love him.”

Touka shrugged her shoulder nonchalantly. “That’s what I thought, I just wanted to hear it out loud.” She gripped the handle and raised the knife straight up in front of Lucy. “Say good-bye.”


	21. Chapter 21

In a split-second decision, slow motion scene, Lucy watched as Natsu lurched forward, stumbling to his feet and she threw her bound hands straight up, while the knife was coming down towards her chest, striking Touka in the face hard enough to stun the woman temporarily. As Touka lets out a scream, she quickly drops like a sack of rice to the ground out of the way just as Natsu reached them and grabbed for the knife still clutched in the woman’s hand. Lucy shuffled across the floor like a caterpillar to avoid being kicked and got to her feet. It was difficult because her ankles were still tied, but she used a nearby desk to pull herself up.

By that time, Lucy’s emotions were a rollercoaster and focusing on what to do was problematic. She could do little but watch her boyfriend tussle with the psychotic blonde whose adrenaline sure was fueling a surge of strength. He was unleashing on the woman, uncaring that she was a female like a fearsome dragon of fairytales protecting its territory. Lucy’s never seen Natsu so angry before. It was both exhilarating and frightening at the same time. Punches and kicks are swung in no coordinated manner with both sides grappling for control over the weapon. Then suddenly, a guttural roar lets loose by Natsu as Touka slashed deeply into his left cheek. Lucy clutched the sides of her head as white noise sparked in her ears at the sight... blood! Dark red seeped down onto his shirt, crawling along the cotton fabric in a widening spread from his shoulder, down his chest. The white noise was her own high-pitched scream echoing in her brain.

Natsu covered and applied pressure to the wound on his cheek with one hand as he swung hard and finally landed a solid blow to Touka’s face with the other, stunning the woman. Touka stumbled back into a wall. The woman still had the knife, but it bought Natsu some time. So, he screamed to Lucy, “run! Get out of here!! Get out of here!!”

That snapped Lucy back to the present. Right! There wasn’t any time for hysteria. She quickly crouched down and worked at the bindings on her ankles. The knots were tough, but uncaring if she broke a nail, Lucy dug at them, tugging and yanking the loops. Thank goodness Touka wasn’t an expert at knot tying. All the while she worked, she continued to keep an eye on the fight. Touka had gotten over her dazed condition and she and Natsu were back to struggling. Blood was flying everywhere because of all the movement. _‘Oh, kami please!’_ Lucy prayed for help to arrive. Someone had to have called the authorities by now with all the screaming going on!

Her ankles freed, Lucy looked towards the front door and freedom, but then switched gears and scanned the room for a makeshift weapon. She couldn’t leave Natsu to defend himself all alone and besides her own anger was mounting too. Lucy didn’t look to violence as a first option, but she was no weak princess either. Seconds tick by as she fumbled with her analytical mind to focus. The desk chair? No, too heavy for her to swing efficiently. A pen? She could stab Touka... that’s when Lucy sees it. A hardcover book on the desk with Meguro Nihon written on the cover. It must be Touka’s old yearbook, but why was it left out like that? Such a question could wait for an answer, because in the time Lucy struggled to pick a weapon, another cry echoed in the room. She whipped around at the sound to see Natsu stumble back clutching to his side, and more blood already pooling into the fabric. Shit!

It was now or never. Lucy grabbed the book as all the anger building up to that moment was unleashed on their kidnapper, and a physical strength she didn’t even know she’d possessed broke free. Touka was not going to win! If anyone was walking out of here it was her and Natsu! She swung with all her might, not at Touka’s body or head, but for the hand holding the knife. It took two lightning-quick swings, but she knocked it from the woman’s hand. Touka screamed and clutched her hand to her chest, but Lucy wasn’t finished. With the weapon no longer a threat, Lucy gave the woman no chance to breathe as she continued to swing hitting Touka with the binding of the book binding. Blows to the head, chest, anywhere it landed, Lucy didn’t care because her rage had taken over. Is this what it felt like for Touka when anger took complete control? Over and over Lucy raised the book up and landed blows. The woman was on the ground now, but she followed, instantly dropping to her knees to continue the onslaught.

“Bitch??!!” Lucy screamed at the woman. “I’ll show you what this bitch can do!” Even as Touka cried out for her to stop and tried to curl in on herself for protection, she kept going, barraging with both worded screams and sloppy blows.

Lucy was so focused on her anger, that she doesn’t even register the introduction of Gajeel who’d arrived or Natsu screaming at her to step away from Touka. All she could think about was the pain the woman had put them through, how scared she’d been when she’d woken up bound on the floor, and all the blood... the dark red blood like a veil over Lucy’s eyes. No! She wanted Touka to bleed too! In that moment, Lucy wanted the woman to feel all the pain and agony flowing through her veins!

“Lucy stop!!”

Hands swarm around her body and yank her away still swinging and screaming. She then sees Gajeel stepping past her and Natsu as Touka tried to get back to her feet, he shot the woman with a taser, sending the woman into electro convulsions onto the floor. Lucy’s hands cradled her head as it shook back and forth in frustration. Why was the white noise back?!

“Lucy, it’s over, it’s over!”

The hands tightened around her waist. It was Natsu trying to calm her down, and the white noise her screams. But her mind struggled to readjust and come down from the high. It wanted to hurt Touka more!

“Shhh, Lucy, it’s over.” His head rested against hers, cooing in a soft voice over and over.

How strange it was for Lucy, but all that explosive turmoil vying for revenge finally exhausted as her eyes processed Touka being taken into custody. It was over! Her body collapsed into a fit of heaving tears as if all the weight she’d been carrying suddenly turned to water, but luckily Natsu kept Lucy from crashing to the floor. It was the first opportunity for her to cry, and let loose she did, a dam cracked and broken, her body let go of all the pain and focus it held. She could grieve now and process the emotions she’d pushed away to stay focused. Her hands clutched to Natsu’s sticky shirt uncaring if it stained her skin.

“The nightmare’s over now.”

But Lucy whined and shook her head because she knew it wasn’t. Yes, they were safe now and this part was over, but there was still the investigation, the trial, and learning to mentally move on. None of this was going to easy.

“Hey, hey,” Natsu spoke softly and held her closer. “We’re gonna get through this together Lucy. I promise.”

She sniffled. “I hope so...” _Lucy really hoped so..._


	22. Chapter 22

Lucy’s eyes flashed wide as her emotions swung drastically from her own distress to the blood still dripping down Natsu’s cheek. “Shit! Shit! Shit!” She scrambled away from him, stumbling on her knees to right herself as she looked quickly around the room for any fabric. She grabbed a towel off the kitchen counter and rushed back, dropping to her knees as she pressed it to the wound. Tears renewed in her eyes. “Look at what she did, this is so bad! It’s gonna leave a scar for sure! Oh god,” her eyes flit back and forth rapidly from his face to his body, “and your side too! This is so bad!” The tears flowing down her cheeks were a mixture of emotions. Lucy lifted his shirt, flinching, fingers curling into the hem in anger as she sees the jagged wound on the side of his abdomen. If it had gone just a little deeper, he wouldn’t be sitting there with her and that really set her off! “You should’a let me beat her senseless! Look at this! She deserves to be in the same pain she put you through!”

Despite the physical pain, Natsu was trying desperately to keep his girlfriend from losing it again and seeing the wound was only riling her up further. He gently moved her shaky hands away from his side to push his shirt down again. “Lucy, it’s okay, really, d-don’t work yourself up, please? What’s important is we made it.”

“But still! This wasn’t fair!”

“Shhh, baby, it’s gonna be okay...”

“No, it’s not! Stop saying that!” Lucy snapped back. She wasn’t an idiot. She could see the pain in his grimaced features which only made her even more furious. “This will never be over. Those scars won’t go away! I’m gonna have nightmares, I know it! So, don’t you tell me it’s gonna be okay!”

Her emotions were in full throttle mode as she then flailed her bound wrists at the milling officers. “And will somebody get these damn ropes off me?!?!” One of the men cut her loose as she continued to scream and cry.

“I hate her! I hate her for what she’s done! I-I’ve never hated anyone before, but right now I just wanna... I just wanna...”

Still holding onto his side, Natsu used his left arm to pull his girl into a tight hug. He knew exactly what words were on the edge of her lips, but his current priority was calming her down and agreeing would only fuel her anger. “Lucy shhh,” he cooed in a soft tone, “it’s okay, baby it’s okay...”

“It’s not! It’s not!” Once again, Lucy slumped against him as another wave of hysterical sobbing racked her body. It wasn’t okay! She’d been kidnapped and almost killed! Her boyfriend was seriously injured all because Touka couldn’t except reality. None of this was okay! She couldn’t take much more of these roller coaster emotions. Sadness, anger, relief, they continued to alternate in her mind. Leaning back and fixing him in a narrowed and pained glare. “I thought I was gonna die— Natsu I just can’t stop thinking about that! Die, do you understand?!” Her chest heaved with every word. “I was so scared... so scared—,” her hand unconsciously moved up to cup around the front of her neck as if still feeling the sensation of the knife pressed against it. “I-I don’t even know how I kept myself from losing it... I just kept thinking, I gotta get out of here, I-I gotta figure out a way to save myself. And when she raised the knife—.” Her words cut off mid-sentence and eyes drifted to the spot they’d been standing in as if her thoughts halted in remembrance.

“Lucy,” Natsu cradled her cheek, pulling her gaze back onto him, “you are so much stronger then you give yourself credit for.”

She rolled her eyes in an exasperated sob. “If I’m so strong, then why am I crying now?!”

His eyes softened. “Because you can. You did what you had to stay alive and now you can let it all go. Baby, it’s okay to let it out. Let it all out and cry as much as you need to, cause I’ll hold you for as long as you need it.”

Lucy paused her words and simply cried for several minutes against his chest. She didn’t feel strong, and how was he staying so calm?! But oh, how she needed the reassurances. Deep down she knew he was just trying to help, knew what he was saying was the truth, but even if she’d wanted to stop thinking about these things, she couldn’t. The night played out on an endless loop in her mind’s eye. What could she have done to avoid this? Was there anything she could have said to stop Touka? She didn’t know if it was her heart or her head trying to tell her no, that nothing would have changed the woman’s plans. But once the dam had broken, her mind just wasn’t ready to fully let go. It was too angry about everything, even feared just how angry this was all making her feel. Lucy didn’t like it one bit. Ugh! What was Touka turning her into?!

“I wanted to kill her, Natsu... does that make me bad just like her?”

Those words whispered out by Lucy as she rested her head on his shoulder, stunned Natsu, but he could understand the reasoning. In such a heated moment when instincts took over, it’s either kill or be killed and he could admit to himself, if he’d had the chance, he would have done so too. But Touka had proven to be a a lot tougher then she looked. Perhaps the woman was running on the same anger that now plagued his girlfriend? It was perfectly clear how both he and Lucy were going to need therapy after this if they were to get back to a normal life, but he also needed to cling to hope, to make sure Touka didn’t succeed in ruining the rest of their lives.

He kissed her temple. “It’s normal to feel that way, but you’re not a killer,” Natsu reassured Lucy in a soft tone. “That’s just not who you really are.”

His words seemed to work for the time being as the woman quieted enough for the medical workers who’d arrived to start their job. The wound to Lucy’s neck was quickly cleaned and bandaged, but Natsu’s injuries were much more severe. The EMT’s cleaned and stapled the cheek and side wounds, but he’ll need to be taken to the hospital for scans to ensure it didn’t knick any internal organs, as well as to better suture the wounds.

A flurry of more officers had descended to start an investigation, of which Gajeel took the lead. And there was a wealth of information in the apartment to document. As they’d already learned, Touka was a former schoolmate of Natsu from high school who had reams of pictures, print outs from social media, even personal information on Natsu as well as Lucy that they would need to figure out how she’d somehow obtained. The woman hadn’t been kidding about stalking the man for years.

Once the officers had arrived, everything became a blur for Lucy who felt pulled in multiple directions all at once. She was so overwhelmed by the flood of information and experiences that her mind was shutting down, body numbed in an adrenaline stupor. Medical personnel were trying to work on Natsu and attend to her superficial neck wound, while detectives were asking them questions about the ordeal. When they’d tried to separate the couple to interview them, Lucy wasn’t having it, clinging harder to the man so they’d given up.

No, she’d knocked me out, so I don’t know how she got me here. Yes, I woke up bound on the floor. Yes, she’d kept the knife to my throat most of the time. Yes! Most of the time! How long... how the fuck should I know?! She moved it briefly to think! No, I don’t know how long I was unconscious, does it really matter?!

Any strides Natsu had made at calming her down went out the window. Lucy’s whole body was shaking in anger as she cradled her head to block them out. She was seriously about to have a mental break down right then and there. “Can everyone give me some fucking breathing room?! We told you this was fucking serious, but you didn’t believe us!”

Natsu too, had grown frustrated by the pointed and emotionless questioning. Here they’d just been through a harrowing ordeal, and these police offers were victimizing his girlfriend for a second time! He snapped at one of the detectives to stop traumatizing Lucy. “The woman was seconds away from being killed, have some fucking compassion!”

That’s when Gajeel, who’d had his hands full directing everything, finally stepped in and told the other detectives to cool it for now, growling at them to remember they were the victims. “You fuckers worry about collecting physical evidence. I’ll deal with the interviews once they’re cleared by the doctors!” He then redirected back to the couple. “Levy’s gonna meet you two at the hospital, then once the doctors are done, you’ll come to my office for an interview. It’s gonna be rough, not gon’ lie, but I’ll try to make the process as easy on you as I can.”

“Thanks, man,” Natsu expressed a sincere gratitude to Gajeel who simply nodded back and directed the EMT’s to take them to the hospital.

Lucy helped Natsu to his feet and the couple are guided downstairs to the awaiting ambulance. As they pass by the other apartments, it’s obvious the whole incident had drawn the attention of residents or neighbors, who peered through windows or tracked with eyes the couple walking by. It was creepy, irritating, calling upon what little reserves she had to not stop walking and snap. She wanted to scream, mind your business! Till she realized if they hadn’t done so in the first place, maybe someone would have caught onto Touka’s behaviors sooner. Did the woman really have no friends? If anyone had visited the apartment and saw the Natsu collage plastered all over the wall, it would have raised eyebrows in the least. Or maybe... no one cared... it’s not a stretch to think any friends Touka has are just as crazy as she is. Not even the police cared enough to take them seriously. Why? Because it’s just too strange for a woman to be so mentally unstable? Probably chalked it all up to a lovers triangle gone wrong. What if?! What if?! What if?! Lucy’s mind was starting to race again with thought, after negative thought pulsing through faster then she could process them.

Her hand started tightening on Natsu’s as they sat side by side in the ambulance causing him to look over and question her. “Lucy, you okay?” His worried tone growing with each second. Her body was shivering yet tense, head shaking no, eyes wide but glassy, and breathing growing labored in rapid bursts. The EMT sitting across from them watching the events unfold, reached out to take Lucy’s wrist. She flinched but doesn’t pull it back. After a few seconds of silence, the man let go and warned that her pulse was racing.

“Miss, you’re having a panic attack.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was 4 more chapters planned, but depending on how things play out I may need to add more as needed. While the major things I wanted to hit upon were planned out in advance, I never know where the characters and stories will take me lol. 
> 
> A question for any readers who see this note is: How much of Lucy's recovery from this ordeal would you like to see or should I delve into? It would lengthen the amount of angst, but also add to the growing relationship and bond between Natsu and Lucy.
> 
> Thoughts?


	23. Chapter 23

“Lucy, baby,” Natsu’s hand squeezed harder. “You gotta calm down.”

“Ma’am... ma’am,” the EMT snapped his fingers in front of Lucy’s face. “Ma’am, I need you to focus on me. Can you focus on me?”

Their words were just muffled static, barely any tone and definitely not comprehensible to Lucy for there was too much competition vying for attention flowing through her mind. It felt like standing in a rapid wave break of constant ebb and flow but pounding against her prone body flattened into the shoreline. The thoughts raced so quickly, screaming, with only the harshest words coming through like a foghorn in the blackest night. _Death. Pain. Blood. Anger,_ along with the emotional turmoil that came with them. Each rushing wave of anxiety fueled irrational thought after thought. ‘ _Stupid, stupid girl! Such a selfish fool! This was your fault for stealing away someone else’s love, a fantasy home wrecker! Fuck that! Natsu was mine fair and square, damn it! I deserved Natsu just as much and he loved me! Not Touka! Me!!!’_ Lucy’s mind screamed, but the stares ate away... All those eyes judging her as they took that walk of shame. The authorities, the neighbors, heaven help her the talk that’s bound to get around. Will there be whispered, and hushed tones muttered around her, bearing down with all the weight of a thousand gravitational forces?! It was too much! Too mu—

“Oww!!” Lucy screamed and yanked her hand back, as she felt a sharp stab on the back of her hand. “What the fuck did you do that for?!” She glared at the EMT while rubbing and nursing the angry red spot. Whatever the man had done had hurt, but aside from the pain, nothing broke through the skin.

Without missing a beat, the EMT merely retook Lucy’s hand and placed two fingers over the pulse point in her wrist. “Can you tell me your name?” He questioned, speaking in a soft tone.

“Of course, I can! It’s Lucy Heartfilia!”

“Mmhmm,” he uttered in response. His eyes stayed trained on his own watch. “Do you know where you are?”

“In a fucking ambulance!”

“And who’s the current prime minister?”

“Huh? Um,” she paused with her head slightly tilted, “it was Abe, but I don’t remember the new guys name.”

“Close enough. Your pulse is still high, but it’s coming down now.” The EMT let go of Lucy’s hand, talking as he continued working on things. “I’m sorry to use such a technique, but when a person is in a panic attack, we need to snap them out of it as quickly as possible to keep it from escalating. Basically, during an attack your mind goes on overload, but physical stimulation can halt it. Shocks, if you will, to snap your focus away from cognitive thoughts back to the physical reality. The questions were to check if your cognitive focus had returned.”

“Oh...” was all Lucy could respond with to all the jargon. She hadn’t even realized she was having a panic attack. “T-Thank you...” But she wondered for a moment, just some physical pain could stop all those bad thoughts? It was something she’d never known before.

“You’re welcome. There are other methods including those you can administer to yourself at the immediate onset, so I suggest you look into them in case of another attack.”

“You think she’ll have more?” Natsu questioned with an obvious mix of concern and curiosity. The whole thing happened so quickly, that by the time he’d registered how bad it was, he couldn’t even react to a stranger stabbing a pen into his girlfriend’s hand. He was annoyed but glad this EMT was able to stay completely focused and calm.

“Traumatic events can cause a lot of emotional reactions including panic attacks. So, it’s a good idea to be prepared just in case.” The EMT now injected her arm, explaining as he went. “This is a mild sedative just to help you relax.”

By the time they’d reached the hospital, the sedative was taking effect and Lucy struggled to keep her eyes open. The level of exhaustion blindsided them both. Physically exhausted as if she’d run a marathon and emotionally drained. The closest she could rationalize it to was studying for the college entrance exam and how tired she’d been once it was over. So, she sat quietly as the medical personnel double checked her wounds, but too dazed to pay attention when they were giving her aftercare instructions. Thank goodness for Levy who’d been waiting as soon as they’d arrived. The woman handled a lot of the talking for Lucy and Natsu, but Natsu himself was being worked on next to Lucy. His wounds were cleaned up better so they could get a closer look.

The doctors inform Lucy she’s free to go but Natsu would have to stay so they could run X-rays. She wanted to fight to stay because right now he was the closest thing to security she had but could barely focus. With some gentle coaxing from both Natsu and Levy, and reminders that Touka wasn’t getting out of jail, Lucy eventually relents. A police officer would be escorting the women back to their apartment.

“Just try to get some sleep, please,” Natsu kissed his girlfriend. “I promise to call you as soon as I can, but I might pass out as soon as I hit my bed.” He wanted to be honest with her but assuring at the same time.

“O-Okay,” she nodded slowly, glassy eyed from exhaustion and sadness. “I understand.”

He leaned his head to her forehead while cupping the back of her neck. “We’re gonna be okay, Lucy. We’re gonna get through this, and I’ll be there for you no matter how long it takes.”

That pulls a few sniffles out of the woman who closes her eyes. “I love you, Natsu.”

“I love you too, Lucy.” He sits back up. “Now promise me you’ll get some sleep?” She nodded. Natsu smiled. “That’s my girl.”

Gray arrived shortly after the two women left for the night to keep his friend company and help him get home. Natsu wasn’t keeping track of time, but it sure felt like this was taking forever. The police had taken both he and Lucy’s phones for evidence, so he had nothing to pass the time with. Luckily, there wasn’t a lot of downtime between treatments. After the X-ray, the doctors sedated him and sewed up the wounds on his cheek and abdomen. It took both internal and external sutures, but luckily the side wound didn’t hit anything major. According to the doctor, the knife had missed the large intestine by a centimeter. He’ll be left with nasty scars for life, but a life is one he’ll at least have.

“You okay, man?” Gray questioned.

“Just tired and sore,” Natsu sighed. Now that Lucy wasn’t there, he let his body and mind fully register all the physical pain he was going through. “I just wanna fall into my bed.”

The doctors told Natsu, he should fully heal in about six to eight weeks, pending he keep the wound clean, keep his health up, and above all did nothing to aggravate it. So much for working, but he was sure that Makarov will make an exception. Maybe put him on register, light stocking, and inventory with no heavy lifting. As for how bad the scars will be, only time will tell. Plastic surgery might help, but that costs money. In a fleeting thought, Natsu worried that Lucy would leave him over it. _‘No way, she’s not vain like that... although the reminder it gives might be the problem...’_ he quickly dismissed the notion from conscious thought, even though it lingered in the background. It would certainly hurt if she did, but could he really blame her? To be reminded of the night she almost died every time she looked at him? Natsu wanted to believe that Lucy was strong enough to get through this, and regardless if things eventually didn’t work out between them, he’d never stop trying to help her. He owed her that much for putting her in this situation. Well... that wasn’t fair, he couldn’t have foreseen Touka’s behavior, but it didn’t make him feel any less guilty for it.

“We’re here.”

Grays voice snapped Natsu out of his thoughts. He looked out of the taxi window to see the front of their apartment building. “Oh, right.” He was so ready to clean up and sleep.

Inside their apartment, Natsu took a shower, and Gray helped him to re-bandage his wounds. The warm water and sensation of being clean helped him to feel a little better, at least physically, even though the emotional turmoil still churned. But as he laid in bed, the exhaustion was swiftly taking over. There was so much to do. Replace their phones, the official police interview, notifying their jobs and schools to make sure they wouldn’t fall behind. Even the EMT’s comment was nagging at him, so note to self, call the shrink in the morning... well, as soon as he woke up anyways. By the time his eyes were shuttering closed, the early breach of dawn had made its calling. It was a new day and all Natsu could hope was to start anew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank You to Uzumaki_Naho & Mcornilliac on Tumblr for your comments and input! I've taken them into consideration for the direction of the story. 
> 
> Warning the next, maybe 4 chapters is straight angsty lol. stress, depression, anger, anxiety and all the trimmings might appear. If there are any new trigger warnings, I will add them to the tags :)
> 
> This story will end happy, I swear lol.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lucy POV

The university and Lucy’s professors had been really wonderful about everything, even offering to convert her classes to an online option so she could continue. She wasn’t happy about the idea of taking a sabbatical from college, but there was no way she could manage. Not only was it difficult for her to leave the apartment because seeing anyone that remotely resembled Touka sent her into a panic attack, focusing on anything at all was a struggle. Night after night it haunted her dreams and spilled into her waking moments. She’d run scenarios through her mind, all the what if’s, should haves, could haves, often leading to horrifying outcomes. They’d survived, yes, but at what cost?

She didn’t feel the same anymore as if a part of her did die in that apartment or fled to a hidden part of her brain too scared to come back out. The once happy, positive person had become a nervous wreck unable to control her emotions or outbursts. Lucy’s bedroom became her safe zone from everyone, even those closest to her, ashamed and insecure of their judgement. In her heart she knew friends like Levy or Natsu wouldn’t judge... but tell that to her broken mind, because her brain was the one in control at the moment, and insisted they’d look down on her.

All the irrational thoughts. It was her fault for not being careful, her fault she was kidnapped. Lucy knew Touka was growing dangerous, yet walking alone, at night... utterly stupid. She should have been overzealous at protecting herself, but oh no, stupid girl didn’t want to believe anything would actually happen. Until it did. And now she was even more pathetic and weak for not getting a hold of her emotions, for not controlling it instead of it controlling her. The danger had passed. They were alive. Touka was in jail. It should be over, but it wasn’t. Lucy couldn’t move past that night, stuck in an endless loop of fear. So many nights she’d wake up in a panic covered in sweat, the fading images of red... blood... like dripping down a tv screen in a horror movie. It was Natsu’s blood she saw and his screams when the knife had sliced him open.

The first week after the event had been difficult, sitting through an interview with Gajeel, and reliving all the mental wounds. It took several hours to get through it all despite the man doing his best to go easy on her. Each time painful parts came up, Lucy felt the anxieties rise, the mental blurring, the shaking, literally a physical shaking of her body in an effort to dispel the rise of adrenaline coursing through her veins. Interviews are best done without any other potential witnesses in the room to avoid cross contamination, but after Lucy’s first two attempts to talk to investigators failed, Gajeel was forced to allow Natsu in with explicit instructions to sit quietly and say nothing while the woman talked. Of course, Natsu’d been fine with that, he’d do anything to help, even if it was just holding Lucy’s hand. But it only added to her embarrassment. Surely Natsu will eventually tire of having an unstable girlfriend.

Then there was the therapist Levy helped Lucy to find which she hoped would help her to quickly get over the events and move on. So, when the woman explained that such traumas take patience and time to process, Lucy was devastated. It almost felt like nothing was going her way anymore, falling dominoes with no end in sight. She felt so ashamed for having to see the woman in the first place, and now she’s told it would be a long journey towards recovery. Just great! What’s next?!

“Lu?” Levy knocked before opening the bedroom door. “Are you gonna eat your dinner in here again? It’s ready.”

With the curtains drawn, Lucy’s room was dark and the only light available was a small desk lamp next to the bed set to a low setting. She peeked out from under her blanket. “I-I’ll come out in a minute, thanks Lev.”

As soon as her friend closed the door, Lucy exhaled in relief. She knew Levy was worried about the amount of time she stayed holed up in the room, so to dispel some of those concerns, Lucy would join her roommate for meals. She quickly applied a gauze wrap, threw on her long sleeve hoodie, and left the room. It made her feel safer to be shrouded and covered up, so gone were her skirts and tank tops, and hello to long sleeves and pants. If she could cover her face from the world, it would make her happy. Even her overall hygiene suffered. Lucy would forget to bathe or wash her hair for days on end, and it took Levy or Natsu with gentle prodding to get her to do it. She would wear the same clothes for a week if it wasn’t for Levy who made sure she changed at least every couple of days. Hell, she’d starve if her roommate wasn’t feeding her. This was a frustrating cycle, not having the mental energy to take care of herself, then feeling bad because they had to help her with things, which made her feel even worse.

It tore at Lucy’s heart to watch Natsu going through this process with her. She knew he was going through his own struggles, not just mental, but physically healing from his wounds. And here she was, the basket case of instability. Bless him, he never gave up no matter how distant she grew, but after that night, Lucy really didn’t want to talk about anything out loud, not that night, and certainly not the true extent of her pain from it. Both Levy and Natsu knew only what she couldn’t hide from them. Like the panic attacks, and since she really didn’t want them to see her go through one or what she’d resorted to, to calm herself, the safest solution was to stay quiet and not trigger them in their presence.

To show his dedication, Natsu even went with her to her therapy sessions and waited outside the office. Lucy knew it was costing him money to do this, because she couldn’t ride a train which meant cab rides every single trip. It bothered her a lot, but she did her best to hide it, and besides there was one small measure of security in having him at her side when she needed to venture out into the public.

“So, the nightmares are still a problem?” the therapist questioned Lucy. “Are you sure you don’t want to try a medication? It would help to ease them until we can get things under control.”

Lucy gripped to the hem of her sweater. “I just don’t wanna become addicted to that stuff...”

“That’s understandable. But not all are addictive, and I’ll be here to make sure it doesn’t get out of hand.”

“I... I don’t think I’m ready.”

“Okay, that’s fine,” the woman smiled. “Remember I’m just here to help you, at your pace. I won’t force you take anything you don’t want to.”

“Thank you.”

“What about the breathing and relaxation techniques? When you feel the anxiety rising, are you trying out the steps?”

“I try... I don’t think I’m very successful at it.”

“Does it work sometimes?”

Lucy pauses for a few seconds in though before nodding yes.

“See, that is progress!” The woman encouraged excitedly. “Two weeks ago, it didn’t help at all, and now it works sometimes. It’s a big step forward Lucy.”

“Doesn’t feel like it is...” Lucy mumbled.

“I know it’s hard to see it for yourself, and that’s okay. These things take time and practice. Do you remember what I said about these things?”

“Not really.” Which was true. During the first week when the therapist explained the processes, Lucy had stopped listening as soon as the woman said it would take time.

“Let me ask you a question. You like to write stories, right?”

“Yeah.”

“When you first started, were you able to just write perfect stories.”

“Pfft, no.”

“Then how did you get better at it?”

Lucy rolled her eyes, knowing where this was going. “Practice.”

“Yes! The PTSD required learning new coping skills as well as unlearning irrational ones. To do both takes practice. The more we work at it, the easier it will get, I promise. One day you’ll be able to look back at this experience and feel stronger for it.”

She really wanted to believe the woman, but it was so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel! Tears well up in Lucy’s eyes, seconds before they start to flow down her cheeks. “Why is this so hard?! I just wanna get back to normal!” She could feel her anxieties rising. “I... I-I don’t wanna talk about it anymore! I just wanna forget it ever happened!”

The woman reached over and took Lucy’s hand, applying a strategic amount of pressure while rubbing her thumb over the webbing in a counter stimulus. She softened we tone. “I wish I could say that would work, but in order to get past it, you need to confront it. Together we’re gonna turn the boogieman into Casper the friendly ghost.”

It was such a weird way of putting things, it caused Lucy’s mind to snap out of the anxiety and snort a sniffling laugh in response. “Casper the friendly ghost?!”

“It was the first thing to pop into my mind,” the therapist laughed too. “The point is, we’re going to work together and slowly bring you to a place where this no longer scared you.”

“O-Okay...”

The rest of the session was tough, and Lucy had come close to a panic attack several times, but as a trained therapist, the woman stepped in at the right times to bring her levels down again using breaks abs breathing routines. Sure, with a professional in front of you, it wasn’t as bad, but doing this on her own, the attacks were still winning. At the end of the session, the woman suggested a new technique to try out based on Lucy’s love of writing.

“You’ve heard of art therapy, so just think of this as a different form of creative therapy. Writing a diary is helpful to get out your feelings out in a healthy way. But let’s take it one step forward to use your skills in fiction writing. I want you to try before the next session, writing a story where you interject your emotions, feelings, whatever you want into the characters and story. Kind of like your character becomes you, but now you get to control what happens to them after the trauma they endure.”

“Wait, so you want me to write about a character that goes through what I went through?! Like torture my own character?!”

“Yes, to put it bluntly. Take your pain and unleash it onto the fictional character. It’s a much healthier way of releasing your anger or frustration in something that can’t really be hurt. Do whatever you want to them. But remember you also get to give them the ending you want to. It’s about utilizing a tool you’re already comfortable with and taking back some control. It’ll be normal if you cry, scream, and get upset through the process, but that’s okay, because instead of holding it all in, you’re getting your feelings out.”

Lucy slumped back in her seat. It sounded strange, yet at the same time made a bit of sense to her. Angst type stories were not really her forte, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t do it, especially since pain is all she was channeling at the moment. She sighed. “I’ll try.”

“And that’s totally okay. All I ask is that you give it a try.”


	25. Chapter 25

“I just don’t know what to do Levy. Sometimes I feel like she doesn’t want me to visit but is too afraid to tell me so.”

 _“I can’t say I know exactly how you must be feeling,”_ the woman on the phone responded, _“but I don’t think Lucy really feels that way. It may seem like it, I know because sometimes I wonder too, but I think I know her well enough to say she’s just struggling. If anything, it’s why we can’t give up even if she tries to push us away.”_

Natsu sighed, “you’re right... I know you’re right. Maybe it’s just my own insecurities talking.”

_“How are you coping with everything. You know it’s okay to admit you need support too.”_

“I know... I-I’ll be fine, I swear. I just need time to process it all. I start my own therapy soon too.”

_“I’m glad you finally agreed to it. There’s no shame in therapy.”_

“Thanks, Levy...”

Compared to Lucy, Natsu knew he was handling things better— not by much, but at least outwardly, he appeared to be coping enough to function. There were so many juxtaposed emotions he swung between. He needed to appear strong for Lucy, to provide a measure of security, while at the same time fighting his own demons of namely guilt and fear. After all, he was the link between the two women’s colliding. It was his fault, regardless of if they saw it coming or not. But that was the problem. The more he thought about it all. The more he stretched his memories all the way back to high school, there’d been so many red flags he’d overlooked and ignored... this really was all his fault.

Of course, his closest friends all objected to this line of reasoning. There was no way Natsu could have foreseen Touka’s rise and fall down the rabbit hole of insanity. Or as Erza snapped, _‘you don’t have a crystal ball.’_ So, what, if that were true. Sure, he was no fortune teller, but that doesn’t mean he couldn’t have paid attention to the signs better. Why was only hindsight 20/20?! Is it so wrong to see the best in people? Natsu hated negative thinking and always tried to see the bright side. To not hurt people or cause waves. He genuinely just wanted to be friendly!

It wasn’t enough...

And for all of his innocent desires, it hurt the one person who’d stolen his heart. Lucy didn’t deserve what happened to her. She was the innocent party in all of this, thrown into the midst of a love triangle neither knew had been brewing for years.

_Years..._

His interviews with Gajeel were not just to get his statement, but to assist in identifying the wealth of evidence they’d found in Touka’s apartment. And there’d been a lot to go through. Hundreds of photos spanning high school and the years following it contained Natsu along with his friends and family. Some were taken by Touka herself, while others were collected through a variety of means. Cut outs from the high school newspapers, yearbooks, club outings, social media’s. Close ups, distance shots, you name it, she’d collected it. Then there were the journals. Notebook after notebook filled with her thoughts, starting off innocently enough, like a typical teenager talking about their crush, to the later entries filled with rage over Natsu’s refusal to accept her. It was truly the chronicle of a stalker.

Seeing it or rather reading the woman’s own words only added to the guilt Natsu felt. There was no forgiveness in his heart for what she’d done, but that didn’t mean he didn’t feel a little bad for Touka. She was under the delusions of her own making, but the woman clearly loved him more than anything else in the world. Everything she did revolved around winning his heart. During the stand-off, she’d mentioned changing herself to satisfy him, and medical records backed up those claims. How she funded those elective surgeries were still being investigated, but what they did know is she’d gone through several rounds of plastic surgery from a nose job to skin resurfacing, a neck and tummy tuck to a full dental work up. Touka had consulted with a surgeon for breast implants three months before the kidnapping but hadn’t been able to raise the capital to fund it yet.

At first Natsu couldn’t comprehend why anyone would go to such lengths... If Lucy wanted him to change things about himself, would he have done anything to please her, whether she asked or if it was just his own mind telling him to do so? Could love really drive a person to such extremes? Obviously, it could, but would _he_ have given into it? There’s no way to know the answer. What he did know is right now, he’d do anything to keep Lucy happy, even if it meant letting her go. And there in lay his current debate. In theory, yes, he would do it, but in actuality... that jury was still out. The truth was it might kill him to let her go. But that’s just it. Right now, it already felt like she was pulling away from him. Every time he tried to call or visit... the hesitation in her tone... a part of him died. Heaven help him, is this what Touka felt like with every let down? It was barely a few months for him, so to endure it for years, Natsu couldn’t fathom that amount of sheer mental anguish eating away at you bit by bit. A slow, crushing death, like a weight dragging you into the depths of despair. But Natsu had something Touka didn’t, a very strong system of support. His family and friends were the one thing keeping him from diving too deeply into those depths. Gray reminded him every day how much he had to live for and how much it would hurt them to lose their friend.

Natsu knocked at the door frame of Gajeel’s office. “You asked to see me?”

“Yeah, come in.” Gajeel motioned to the adjacent chair. “Sit.” Once Natsu does as asked, he continued to talk. “I need to clarify something. I’ve already spoken to Lisanna to verify her version, but I’d like you tell me if there’s anything you remember about the attack on her three years ago.”

“The mugging? Um, it was some random guy tried to steal her purse or something, but a witness scared him off.”

“Yeah that... we’ve uncovered evidence that it wasn’t random. I can’t give you all the fine details, but we found messages on Touka’s Line (app) suggesting she’d hired a man to kill Lisanna.”

“What?!” Natsu jumped to his feet. “She did what?!”

“Calm down idiot,” the male growled. “Look. What I want to know is around that same time, what was happening between you and Touka, could something have triggered her?”

Natsu dropped into his chair as he ran both his shaky hands through his hair, letting them come to rest, clutched to the sides of his head as it hung down. “Fuck, man, I-I don’t know... I know she didn’t like Lisanna, thought Lisanna was my girlfriend even after meeting Bixlow. She did some of the same creepy stuff she did with Lucy, like talked to Lisanna or would show up at her workplace. We thought after meeting Lisanna’s boyfriend she’d at least backed off from harassing her, but now you’re telling me she’d actually tried to hire someone to kill her?!” He dropped his hands to stare back at Gajeel. “Could this drama get any worse?”

“Let’s hope not. So, nothing specific triggered it that you can think of?”

“No...” Natsu sighed long and deep. “God, I should’a listened to everyone sooner— they all told me to... I don’t know, like be harsher, tell her off, go to the cops, but I was trying so hard not to hurt her feelings, you know? I just figured she was a bit infatuated, and eventually she’d go away. I never, _Ever_ thought for a second she could do...” he waved offhandedly in front of himself, “do anything like she’s done. This is all my fault.”

“You couldn’t have known she’d do any of this. Plus, even when you tried going through the system, it didn’t do any good. Nothing was gonna stop Touka from getting what she wanted.”

“Thanks, man.”

“Yeah. Anyways, that’s all I needed to know. If you think of anything else give me a call.”

“I will. Thanks again Gajeel.”

The rage boiling up in Natsu as he walked out of the precinct that day was only matched by the crushing despair of the new information. Touka had tried to kill Lisanna and Lucy. Two women associated with him, what else is buried in Touka’s past?! Is there anyone else around him that had gone missing at her hands, and he never even knew it? He didn’t think so, but just the thought chilled him to his core. High school had gone by without him even knowing she’d existed, and it wasn’t until college that she’d popped into his life. Lisanna was also the only girl other than Lucy he knew for sure was contacted by Touka. But if she was as crazy as they’re learning, had she bothered anyone else? Past lab partners or female classmates that he’d spent any given amount of time with? Perhaps that was why none of them wanted to remain friends beyond the classroom. At the time, Natsu didn’t think anything of it, but now it made him wonder... though not enough to delve into further. If Touka had in fact scared others off, to contact them now may only re-traumatize them further.

The case had been all over the news when the kidnapping had occurred. Natsu and Lucy’s names were not released to the media, but Touka’s had been. So, anyone who’d had contact with her could have come forward on their own if they’d wanted to. For now, it would be best to put such thoughts aside, for he had bigger issues, present pressing ones like how to help Lucy or himself to move on. How... he really wasn’t sure of, because this wasn’t something you can simply forget. The mental scars are horrible enough, but the physical reminders will last a lifetime. All he needed to do was look into a mirror. Natsu knows he’ll need to learn to accept them, but what about Lucy? When she looks at him and sees the reminders… will she be able to look past them too eventually?


	26. Chapter 26

The therapist greeted the couple as they walked in and sat down on the couch. “Thank you for allowing Natsu to sit in today, Lucy. I don’t want you to think of this as a couples counseling per se, because you’re still my primary client. But I feel that him being here to understand your struggles, as well as his, and being able to express them in a safe environment, will help in your healing process. And thank you Natsu for agreeing to this.”

He sat forward a bit, ready to engage. “Anything to help Lucy.”

“I’d like to start with your homework Lucy, has there been any progress in trying to write out your feelings? Remember, it’s okay if you’re still struggling with that, there’s no judgment here.”

“Not... really...” Lucy fidgeted with the hem of her sweatshirt. “Every time I try to, I-I get too... I start to cry, and the panic rises— I fail at it every single damn time and that makes me feel even worse.”

“You’re not failing. Let’s reword that to struggling and recognize that simply making an attempt is the first step, a very important one to be proud of.”

“Maybe I was just kidding myself all along about writing. Maybe it’s because I wasn’t any good in the first place. It was all in my head.” Lucy could see the frown on Natsu’s face from her words, but that’s how she feels now. There was a time she thought she was a decent writer, maybe not publishing quality yet, but she truly enjoyed it regardless and now, a blank page is all she could muster.

“Natsu,” the therapist directs her question to the man. “It seems you’re unhappy with her statement. Would you say that Lucy’s a good writer? Honest answer.”

“Yeah,” he shrugged, “I mean I’m no expert, but the stuff I’ve seen is pretty good. I definitely couldn’t pull them off.”

“Lucy would you call Natsu a liar?”

The blonde paused, annoyed and offended. She wanted to say yes, only because she didn’t want to agree, but then it wouldn’t be true. Natsu was giving his honest opinion and she couldn’t deny it. “No,” Lucy breathed out. “Look I get it. You’re trying to tell me it’s all in my head, right? It’s just the pain talking, and I’ll get better, and I’ll get back into writing just like before.” Anger had slowly begun to prickle the hairs on the back of her neck the longer she clung to the dissociation. “I-I’m not an idiot! I know this is all stupid shit in my brain! I just can’t stop it!”

“I’m sorry, I pushed you too hard, let’s go back a step here. No one is saying you’re an idiot. On the contrary, you’re very intelligent. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t be recognizing that it’s all in your head, and that recognition is how the healing starts. My role, today with Natsu’s help, is to bring that to the forefront. Bring it out into the open, because sometimes hearing it out loud has a different effect on how we process the information.”

“I don’t get it...”

The woman sat back in her chair in thought for a brief second. “When we think about things just in our head, versus saying it out loud, it triggers different parts of our brain. What studies have found is that talking out loud stimulates... rational... erm, reality I guess is a better term. It becomes more real to us.”

“Huh.” So, what, Lucy rolled her eyes at the suggestion. True or not, she didn’t want to agree, because her mind was still in such a strong state of denial. “I still don’t accept it. It sounds stupid.” Maybe it was just her annoyance talking, but the therapist was getting on her nerves. Lucy knew the woman was just trying to help, but her irrational side didn’t want to deal with any of this. The pain sucked, but so did the treatment. She just wanted to stay in her room, in the dark, away from prying eyes. Surprisingly to Lucy, the therapist didn’t even flinch and the gleam in the woman’s eyes almost looked sadistic in that moment.

“Lucy, I know you know it’s not stupid. That’s just your mind imagining the wrong things, which is why you need to talk about it out loud, so you can hear yourself and how wrong it all sounds.”

Ugh! She was so tired of being told what she is, what she should be thinking, and the condescending tone she wrongly assumed from the therapist triggered an explosion. All the anger she felt about herself was transferred to the therapist in an instant. “I’m wrong?!” Lucy jumped to her feet, her anger crackling through. “No shit! Lady, I’m fucked up!! You want me to talk? Fine! I hate this! I hate everything! It’s all falling the fuck apart and I feel like I’ve been tied to the damn train tracks! Everything I’ve worked so hard for is slipping away! Three years of college being washed down the drain! How the fuck do I catch up now?! I’m so behind! AARRRGHH!!! I-I don’t even wanna get out of bed anymore! I hate myself— _hate_ what I’ve become a-and that makes me even more fucking depressed! And my friends...” Lucy dropped back onto the couch as her shaking hands flew up to cover her face and the dam of tears finally broke loose in a cascade down her cheeks. She cried long, and deep for several minutes, chest heaving and inconsolable.

In that moment, Natsu sat frozen, his eyes swinging back and forth to the therapist and his girlfriend unsure of what to do. Should he move to comfort Lucy? The therapists inaction seemed to suggest the answer was no. It made him furious, yet... she was the professional... before he could make a decision, Lucy finally uncovered her face and look dead at her therapist. Almost forgetting him all together.

“My friends, seeing the looks on their faces...” Lucy dug her fingers into the fabric of her pants in an effort to ground her unraveling mind. “It hurts so fucking much! I must be getting on Levy’s nerves, she didn’t sign up to be my nurse, a-and Natsu, he’ll surely get tired of a basket-case of a girlfriend. I can’t blame him if he left me, I’d leave me too. It’s all just falling apart—” Her chest heaved in a heavy sigh. “I can’t see a way out anymore.”

Seeing the whites of Lucy’s knuckles the harder she clenched onto her leg and seeing the heavy breathing similar to that night in the ambulance. Natsu feared that Lucy was heading towards a panic attack. Wanting to reassure her, Natsu reacted this time and reached up from his seat, quickly grabbing her arm to gain her attention. “Lucy, I’m not—.”

But Lucy screamed and yanked her arm back, face grimacing in pain. “Tsss—Owww!!”

“leavi—” Natsu pulled back immediately. “Oh, shit! I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to! Did I grab you too hard?!” He didn’t think so, but based on her reaction, maybe he had.

“N-No,” she cradled her arm, turning to shield it from him. “You didn’t, I’m fine, it just caught me by surprise.” Lucy quickly brushed it off for fear of requiring an explanation. “Really. S-Sorry, I-I’m probably just too flustered.”

But that explanation didn’t satisfy Natsu. Lucy’s yelp was clearly pain related if buttressed by the fact she continued to hide it. “You’re lying to me,” he reached out, “I’m not mad, just please tell me the truth because it’s obvious there’s something wrong with your arm.”

“N-No, I’m not,” she tried to act like it was true. “See,” she waved it as if showing it was fine. “Nothing’s wrong...” till she accidentally hit it again and flinched, biting her lip just in time to stifle a scream. But she knew in an instant that she’d been caught.

His eyes and tone softened in an effort to lower her inhibitions. “Yes, there is.” Natsu took her arm and started to pull up on the sleeve of her sweater.

Lucy instinctively turned her head away. She didn’t want to see his reaction to the bandage around her arm. Even when he continued to speak, questioned what was underneath it, she answered in one worded responses without looking. But at his gasping sound, her eyes closed in shame. She could see what he saw all from behind her eyelids, all the horizontal cuts running across her left arm. The red, angry lines in varying stages of healing. She kept most of it grouped around the middle of her arm between the wrist and elbow crook. At first, she’d tried what that EMT had done, merely jabbing her arm with a pen or digging her nails into the skin. But it wasn’t enough, so she’d moved onto cutting. It had started out small, just a couple of lines were enough to silence the horrid voices in her head, but like a junky’s tolerance, Lucy had to keep cutting, more and more, deeper, just to feel the same numbing results.

“Is this what I think it is?” Natsu’s shaky voice questioned with moisture filling his eyes. “Oh, Lucy, why didn’t you tell me it was this bad.” Now he knew why she’d started wearing long sleeves even when the weather was warm.

“I’m sorry... I didn’t want anyone to know... but it was the only thing making the voices stop.”

Without another word, Natsu pulled a surprised Lucy into a tight hug, tears of his own spilling. “No, I’m sorry, it’s my fault this is happening to you. I should have dealt with Touka long ago. I should have protected you better. This is on me, but Lucy I’m never gonna let you go, I won’t ever leave you because of this. We’re gonna get through this together. I swear on my life, we’re gonna get through this together. Do you believe me?? Please, tell me you believe me?”

“I do...” she did. The man wore his heart on his sleeve. It was a trait Lucy found most endearing, so how could her heart not accept his words? They sat there in an embrace while time stood still, and a small measure of relief fell over her. It wasn’t much, but it was a glimmer of hope, an ember, and one she hadn’t felt in a long time. This man who’d caged her on that train and captured her heart, she could easily pin all of her pain onto him, but he could also be her salvation. His strong arms wrapped around her broken frame made the scary world fall away, to remind her how much more she yearned to stay within it.

Once he felt Lucy’s body relax, Natsu pulled back, wiping away her tears as well as his own. “Is this the only area?” He gestured at her arm without judgment. And when she nodded, he let out a sigh of relief.

Now that the moment was waning, the therapist who’d been waiting patiently and observing spoke up. She offered the anxiety medications again to Lucy and with Natsu’s gentle coaxing, the blonde finally agreed to it. It couldn’t hurt right? If they didn’t work, she’ll just stop taking them. She didn’t want to see the anguish in Natsu’s eyes anymore, especially now that she realized how much he was internalizing and struggling alone with. He was in just as much pain as she was, so it was time they both do what they could to heal, together.

As they were about to leave, Natsu paused and questioned the doctor. “I have a question. I just realized, even though today was a big episode... Lucy didn’t have a panic attack. Why is that?”

The blonde looked at her boyfriend before her eyes landed on the therapist with an expectancy of an answer. She hadn’t realized that either. Shouldn’t her outburst have triggered one?

“I’m glad you asked,” the woman smiled. “Panic attacks are often triggered by suppression. When you’re trying to hold in your emotions, refusing to let it go, and not show it, but today Lucy let it out. She didn’t hold back so there was no need for her body to react physiologically.” She reached out and placed a gentle hand on Lucy’s shoulder. “Sometimes a good cry and scream goes a long way. Please remember that.”

It was quiet on the taxi ride back to Lucy’s apartment. Not an uncomfortable silence, but maybe just enough had been said in the hour long therapy session that they both still needed time to process it all. Despite her breakthrough, she knew it was still a long battle ahead. The poor coping skills she’d latched onto now needed to be reversed, and frankly she didn’t know if she could do it alone. Of course, she could ask Levy... and the woman did deserve to hear the truth going on... but Lucy really didn’t want to put that kind of pressure on her best friend. Levy had done so much for her already and as much as she appreciated it, it also contributed to her emotional pain. She glanced down at her hand held so tightly by Natsu and wondered... no... The man was struggling as well, so to add hers into his mix, is that really fair? But by that same token, their pain was also a shared one. If there was anything to take away from the session is that perhaps it is together, they’ll better find the end of the rainbow.

Once they arrive at the building and get out of the taxi, Natsu started walking towards it. Lucy tugged back to stop him. “Lucy?”

“Before we go in...” her voice lowers, hesitancy brimming in her tone. “I have a question to ask.”

“Of course, anything.”

“I can’t—, don’t want to do this alone anymore. But I also don’t want to put that kind of burden on Levy.”

“Lucy,” he pulled her hand up, clasped between his palms to his lips where he kissed the fingers gently. “I will do whatever you need me to do.”

She sighed. “Can I move in with you? A-At least until I get control of the panic attacks and the... the thing?” Her eyes flit to her arm rather than say the words aloud. “I know this would intrude on Gray, but I would feel much safer.”

Natsu paused for a second in thought. “I don’t think Gray will mind. I certainly don’t.” He smiled. “We’ll be there for each other.”

“Are you sure? Because there’s still a few things I haven’t mentioned like nightmares. I-I don’t wanna freak you guys out.”

“A promise is a promise, and when I said I’ll do anything, I meant it. Will it be scary, probably, I’m not gonna lie, but I’m willing to do whatever I need to get us through this.”

Lucy’s eyes gloss over, but a tiny smile ticks up at the corners of her lips. “Thank you, Natsu.”

He smiled back, “I’m the one who should be thankful.”

“For what?”

“For not dumping me. As much you’d worried, I’d leave you, I was deathly afraid you’d leave me. I brought this on us, so I wouldn’t blame you from running away.”

“Oh, Natsu.” This time a true smile finally graced Lucy’s face. “I’m not going anywhere either.”


	27. Chapter 27

When he’d agreed to let Lucy move in with them, Natsu could admit it wasn’t the greatest idea to make a snap decision, because inside he knew it wasn’t going to be easy. Plus, it had also put Gray in a tough position, because he knew his friend wouldn’t be so heartless to kick out a female with a problem. Yeah, that was kind of a dick move for which he’ll be paying once the dust had settled. Especially now that they were finding out, just how difficult it was really going to be...

Nightmares? More like night terrors. It wasn’t every single night, but Lucy would often wake Natsu up at all hours as if reliving the events of the kidnapping. Physical movements, from fighting a Touka memory. The whines and screams, sometimes blood curdling shrieks as she’d shoot up in bed covered in a film of sweat, hyperventilating and still in the midst of an unseen attack. It was bad enough that Natsu started sleeping on his side, so if Lucy started swinging, his back took the brunt of it. He’d have to grab her arms and just hold her, doing his best to keep his voice low or soft, until she fully awoke from the dream state and collapsed into his arms in sheer exhaustion. Heaven help him, if this is what Levy had gone through for months, the woman deserved a Nobel peace prize for staying sane. After two weeks of this, Gray arranged with Levy to use Lucy’s room. He didn’t want to abandon Lucy, but the lack of sleep was starting to affect his school and job. It left Natsu all alone with his girlfriend, and frankly it was affecting him too. Not only the mental struggles, but the physical exhaustion made it difficult for him to get his job done. Makarov was a saint for being so understanding through it all.

“You look tired today,” Natsu’s therapist questioned in a toned statement. “I take it you’re still not getting enough sleep.”

The bags under his eyes were a dead giveaway to anyone that saw him. “Is it really that obvious?” Natsu responded with a bit of sarcasm to his tone.

“Is it your own demons or Lucy’s?”

“A mix of both.”

“Have you told her about your struggles or are you still hiding it. You know it’s better if you be honest with her.”

Way to go for the kill shot. The therapist went straight to the heart of things. Natsu sighed, “I told her a little... when she’d admitted being worried I’d leave her.”

“What did you say exactly?”

He fidgeted in the chair. “Well... literally, just that. I was just trying to kill her fears not worrying about my own at the time.”

“Ah. Well, maybe it’s time. You’ve told me that you’re trying hard to help her to get over her own struggles, but Natsu, you also need to take your own advice.”

Turn of the screws. But the therapist was right. “I know. I just worry it’ll add to her worries, which will make it worse, a-and that’s not gonna help either of us.”

“I think you should have more faith in Lucy. As you are her strength, she can be just as much yours. Don’t dismiss the idea before you even try it. If she feels like she’s helping you, it will give her a sense of accomplishment too, just like it gives you when you feel like you’re helping her.”

When the therapist put it that way, Natsu couldn’t help but pause and reflect on it, because damn the woman was making a lot of sense! Why did he fall in love with Lucy in the first place? Because of her feisty personality, that’s why. Had he forgotten? The real Lucy was still in there, it just needed to find its way back to the surface. There’s no harm in being honest about feeling scared or guilty. Kind of bare his heart to her in a way.

“Alright. I’ll give it a shot.”

He knew if he’d waited to confront this, he’d find an excuse not to do it. So that night after dinner, Natsu sat Lucy down for a heart to heart and bore his soul. His fears, his guilt, how the brave face he showed her day after day really just hid his own pain and insecurities over the situation. It was difficult and freeing at the same time to get it off his chest.

“Thank you for telling me, Natsu... that actually makes me feel a little better, because I thought I was going through it alone all this time. I mean, you being positive helps to keep me a little grounded, but it also made me feel like a burden. I want to help you as much you help me.”

“Are you sure? I just don’t want to add to your struggles.”

“I can’t tell you it won’t always be easy, so, all I can tell you is right now is I don’t think it will.”

“Okay— then promise me that you’ll say something if it is, a-and we’ll figure out something else.”

Lucy took Natsu’s hands in her own, “now that, I will promise.”

But despite their decision to co-fight, Natsu still took the initiative for Lucy and himself to figure out how to make things better... or lose his sanity in trying. He scoured psychology websites, searching for therapy’s and techniques used for PTSD, anxiety, depression, or anything related that might be useful, even meditation. It was a lot of work, but the information was useful, and he learned a lot about helping Lucy and himself to heal. Some of the horror stories were difficult to read, yet many of the survivors stories he came across provided the much needed encouragement to get through this ordeal.

The first thing Natsu decided to tackle was the nightmares, and to do that he’d learned he first needed to deal with the underlying causes. Pent up emotions being unleashed in Lucy’s subconscious as she slept were producing these horrific night terrors. With suggestions from both his therapist as well as Lucy’s, Natsu encouraged her every night before bed to write, write anything that came to mind, and he gently coaxed her into letting go of the worst thoughts. Unleash it onto the page, as the therapist put it. Then, together they would meditate using a relaxation technique he’d found appealing. Meditation wasn’t something Natsu thought he’d take a liking to, or even believed would work. But after learning more about it, decided it was worth a shot. Everyone he knew used to tell him, it’s about clearing your mind of all thoughts... yeah, uh-huh, who the hell can pull that off? No, in this other technique it started off by saying that’s almost impossible, and that immediately caught his attention. It taught them about learning to control instead, to have thoughts, but focus them, compartmentalize them away and let them become background static you could more easily ignore through habituation. Ever wonder how a person can sleep near an airport or a train track? It’s because you get used to the sound. Once that’s done, you zero in on something you do want to think about, a nice memory, a sound, whatever you choose. Let it soothe and relax you until the next thing you know, your mind wants nothing more than to fall away into dreamland.

It took a few days of pushing Lucy through each step, because at first, she really did not want to rehash, even in a fictional way, the events of the kidnapping. So, Natsu would pull her onto his lap, with his arms around her waist while she held the paper and pen, closely monitoring her body language. The tensing and shaking were his first signs... _‘it’s okay, let it go...’_ he’d whispered and tightened his hold, continuing the positive mantras, _‘you’re safe now, you can do this, I’ve got ya...’_ Next came the release in the form of tears. A trickle, like a cracking of a dam, until it burst forth. Words on paper and liquid trails along her cheeks, but it was a good thing. All the anger and negativity flowing out instead of walled up in her mind. After a couple of weeks, the techniques were showing signs of working. Lucy awoke less and less because of the nightmares. She was still having some, but they weren’t to the same degree or frequency they’d once been.

“Yup... uh-huh, n-no, really, I am doing much better Lev. Yeah, we’ll visit tomorrow.... That sounds awesome. It’s be awhile since I’ve eaten sushi... I’m pretty sure... I’ll be okay, I promise… Yeah, we’ll meet you at Genki Zushi… Uh-huh, you too Levy. Good night.”

As soon as Lucy hung up her phone call, Natsu checked to make sure she really was okay with the plan to go out for dinner. It’d been just over three months since Lucy went anywhere aside from the doctors or police station willingly.

“I need to do this,” she stammered, taking a deep breath before continuing. “I can’t stay locked away forever.”

Natsu kissed her on the forehead. “I’m really proud of you babe.”

“I’m proud of us both,” Lucy smiled. “But I couldn’t do this without your support.”

Such a simple phrase meant the world to Natsu. After the last two months of struggle, his therapists advice was coming to fruition, or at least his truly believing it was possible. They were on the road to healing and nothing felt better than that, because one of the hardest legs of their journey was coming up fast.


End file.
